12 ways to be the best grandparent you can be
Be their favorite grandparents with these expert tips.
Now that your children are adults, you can focus on the next most important work in your life: grandparents. Regardless of their age, there are clear generational differences between you and them - but that does not mean that you cannot connect with them. Here are 7 expert tips to be the best grandparent you can be.
1 Learn to respect others
"Teach your grandchildren the ways by modeling respect for them and others," explains Paul Hokemeyer, Ph.D. , author of Fragile power: why all this is never enough "In our current philosophy of cancellation of culture and ideological differences, it is very useful to teach our offspring the value of ways." It can be as simple as writing thanks, reminding them to say please and thank you, and to hold the doors open to others.
2 Do not sweat little things
Let their parents sweat little things - not you - said Dr. Hokemeyer. "Accept that they will listen to music, wear clothes and speak in a way that will bother you," he adds.
3 Ask them to teach you things
You might not understand or be interested in the things your grandchildren are, but ask them to teach you will offer you a connection. "Of course, it is easy to hurt your feelings that they spend too much time playing in your presence, but you can develop a significant link with them by asking them to teach you to play," explains Dr. Hokemeyer.
4 Never talk badly about their parents
You might have things to say about one of their parents, but resist the urge. In other words, if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all. If you do, you might regret it. "Doing it, while making yourself feel justifying in the moment will only feel sad, rejected and keeping them away," said Dr. Hokemeyer.
5 Give them experiences
Everyone's best gifts are those that cannot be purchased, explains Dr. Hokemeyer. "You do not exist to provide a bling to their Instagram or Tik Tok accounts. You are there to teach them the true sense of love and how to be a person of value and integrity in a world that has become too obsessed By material consumption, "he explains.
6 Make fun meals
Instead of taking them to eat, make meals a fun activity recommends the grandmother and dietician Bonnie Taub-Dix, RDN, creator of Betterthandieting.com , author of Read it before eating it - taking you with a label to the table. "Studies have shown that children who" play "with their food helping to create and prepare simple recipes are much more likely to eat such foods, including fruits and vegetables they would have otherwise transmitted," said She. Some ideas: AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB
- Have an evening of DIY pizza. "Take out different bowls of fillings, including green vegetables, mushrooms, tomatoes, colored peppers, pineapple, etc. and let children create personal pies garnish their pasta, sauce and cheese bases ", she says.
- The same "cereal bar" can be created with different types of cereals and a variety of fruit. "I would encourage to use cereals with a low sugar content as well as those which provide fibers," she explains.
7 Show them photos
Another way to connect with your grandchildren? “We like to show our photos of grandchildren. They like to see photos of themselves growing up, and it is also a wonderful opportunity to share photos of family members that they may not know or have not had the chance to meet. They will surely have a lot of laughter when they see photos of baby of you, their grandparents, "she said.
8 Demonstrate and teach respect
Hokemeyer highlights the importance of teaching the ways of your grandchildren and how to respect themselves and the others. "Show them the importance of holding an open door for others, writing handwritten thanks and please say and thank you all, especially people who provide services," he said .
9 Accept them for whom they are
Do not sweat little things, recommends Hokemeyer. "No matter how much you love them, your grandchildren will do things that nervous. This is the nature of human beings of different generations," he explains. Accept that they will listen to music, wear clothes and speak in a way that will bother you. "But unless they do something that risks their lives or the life of others, let go."
10 Demonstrate curiosity
You don't need to understand them, but you should try. "In the same vein, instead of holding your generational differences, develop curiosity about them," explains Dr. Hokemeyer. "Of course, it is easy to hurt your feelings that they spend too much time playing in your presence, but you can develop a significant link with them by asking them to teach you to play."
11 Support their parents
Talk about their parents well, especially the one you don't like, recommends Hokemeyer. "Whatever quantity you refute or even disdain one of their parents, tutors or parents, do not share anything negative with your grandchildren about them," he explains. This could prevent them from repelled.
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12 Give them love, not gifts
Finally, offer them the experience gift and not things, explains Dr. Hokemeyer. "Present yourself physically and emotionally in any way possible. Avoid base your relationship on money or the external markers of success. Give your love and emotional support. Make them know that you are a fan and not a critic . "