A "sleep divorce" could save your relationship, say the experts
If you can't have a good night in bed with your partner, think of a new arrangement.
No matter how long you have been together, there is always more to discover on your partner, whether it is a positive that strengthens the union or something that even causes Long -term couples To reconsider their relationship. It also goes for sleep habits. Your spouse may have been a restless sleeper for years or maybe their snoring at High Decibel is a new thing. Anyway, what do you do when your life partner is the reason why you don't sleep a good night? Chris Winter , MD, neurologist and mattress company Sleep Health Expert , has a surprising approach and advice on how to succeed successfully. Read the rest to learn more about how a "sleep divorce" could save your relationship.
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Lack of sleep can have serious consequences.
Sleep is a crucial element of our overall well-being , something that our body must operate on several levels. For most adults, the Sleep Foundation advises "at least Seven hours of sleep Every night for appropriate cognitive and behavioral functions. "A constant lack of sleep can cause problems with cognitive capacities and mood, and it can increase the risk of conditions and diseases such as" obesity, type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, diseases Cardiacs, strokes, poor mental health and premature death, "according to the site.
However, according to a 2017 survey carried out by the Better Sleep Council, 85% of American adults say They have problems Sleep at night. And 40% of these adults said that the sleep habits of their spouse or their partner were the problem - Revolution Relationship problems Maybe another consequence of insufficient sleep.
Sleeping in the same bed is not always what is best for the relationship.
There are different ways in which couples can be awake. Launch, turn and snoring are common problems. "You can have different sleep hygiene habits, which led you to bed later and disturb the other, to create challenges in the room and the hours of standby," said Therapist, advisor and coach Shelly Qualieri , RSW, ma.
Whatever the condition at the origin of the problem, "bad sleep can have a considerable impact on your relationship," warns winter. "People are more irritable, less able to read emotions, more impulsive and more prone to depression if they do not sleep enough."
If the sleep habits of a person (or two people) in a relationship are to cause problems , Winter suggests trying a "sleep divorce". It may seem dramatic, but there are no legal fees or legal documents involved. The term simply refers to couples who decide not to sleep together. "It is logical to sleep whenever the sleep of one partner disturbs another, whether because of the snoring, different working hours or agitation, at least from time to time," says Winter.
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A "sleep divorce" can be a flexible arrangement with advantages for both partners.
While the word "divorce" has negative connotations This does not necessarily increase well for a relationship, choosing a sleep divorce can in fact strengthen a relationship because the two partners are well rested.
If you cannot imagine a night without your romantic partner, winter encourages people "to refrain from thinking of healthy relationships and sleeping in the same bed as mutually exclusive" couple. "If you want to run together, great - but if one of you prefers to go in the morning and the other at night, it's quite good too," explains Winter. "I spend a lot of time saying to couples that it is normal to sleep sometimes." AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB
If you have trouble deciding on a sleep divorce, winter suggests only sleeping on certain days of the week. "This is part of the category of" two days of good sleep is better than nothing, "he says." Doing this can eliminate the guilt that you do not sleep together, it allows you to sleep necessary, and it gives you the opportunity To determine if your spouse is really your sleep saboter. "
After all, sleeping separately can indicate other factors, such as temperature or outside noise - these are the real causes of your disturbed sleep.
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How to succeed in "sleep divorce".
Winter notes that being able to sleep in separate rooms is the ideal approach to a successful sleep divorce. "Having separate rooms gives each partner the possibility of putting their bedroom to their exact specifications, in particular The mattress , lighting and temperature, huge contributing factors to a good night's sleep, "he said.
If it is not possible, Winter recommends making the sofa as close as possible to your bed, using your own pillow, or even wearing a partner t-shirt or pajamas. "Familiar smells will help the sofa to look more like a bed," he said. "Our brain tie feels most closely in memory, so encourage your brain to think that you are in your own bed with your partner."
Winter also recommends choosing some days to sleep if you feel intimidated by the idea of a sleep divorce. "Choose two nights a week, like Mondays and Thursdays, to sleep in different rooms. It works because you don't have to make the decision every night, and it's pretty fun to have these periods when you are Absent, then bring together. "
Another tactic? Try it for a specific opportunity. "It could be advantageous to consider sleeping separately, for example, the day before a large meeting, which also helps you to test the waters, so that you know if it is something you want to do more often" , said Winter.
The main thing, according to Winter: "It's much more fun to be in a relationship when you are both well rested."
