Good Lifestyle

Life is all about choices. Tomorrow morning, are you going to order a latte or flat dish? Will you paint your charcoal lounge or your tin this weekend? Should you take the soul-sucking work withthe high salary Or the low payment you are deeply passionate?

Yes, our days are full of forks on the road and decisions can quickly stack, aggravating all the feelings ofstress and an anxiety in an insurmountable wall of indecisive paralysis. But things should not be like that. In fact, by deploying a series of proven maneuvers, you can become a black belt to make decisions on site. Here, directly from life coaches, psychologists and other experts, are the best methods of combating indecision.

If you are facing a choice that involves several options with a range of different benefits, the implementation of a decision matrix can help you examine things, saysFriend Devero, a personal trainer, a management consultant and an owner ofFriend Devero Coaching and Consulting in Tampa, Florida.

So, what is a decision matrix? "It's basically a table with options listed on the vertical axis and all the costs and benefits expected along the other," said Devero. "To do so, you must create a scale note-say, one to five years and evaluate each option."

If you try to choose between a few laptops, for example, the columns could be "cost", "guarantee", "service included", "software included", "RAM", "speed of the chip" and "Speed Hard Speed ​​". . "From there, Devero says," Assign an option an evaluation number, and then add or multiply each column to get a total. So do what the calculation indicates. "

There is nothing wrong with being an Overachiever, but load your schedule and everything you do is hemulate your own potential. Much better to reduce your goal and give 100% a few things.

"I find it useful to choose one or two clear tasks and use a temporal tracking application so that I spend the majority of my week focused on these one or two things," saysChloe Brittain, an entrepreneur and an owner ofOpal transcription services. "There is a limited number of hours in one day, then insulating my time in this way contributes to strolling information overloading opportunities. It also gives me less things to fear, which helps to take decision in general, not only in business. "

An easy way to force you to make a decision is to define a deadline on any choice you face to face, as long as the said deadline is realistic. If you choose a changing change of life, as in which school of graduate school to go, set a date per month or more in advance. If it's a choice between the colors to paint your living room, two weeks should be numerous.

"Establish a realistic deadline to make the decision and maintain firm limits of not going beyond the allotted time," saidAmy Moreira, a mental health advisor and founder ofMore MH Tips, LLC, a private ambulatory mental health practice in Rhode Island. "Leave small decisions will focus on developing your skills onImprove indecision on the biggest decisions. "

And if you still have not made any choice at the moment of your due date? Flip a coin, says more will. In this way, you can spend once and for all.

Pop Quiz: What works as well on crosswords, on standardized tests and in daily decision-making? If you answered "the elimination process", you win!

Vauser your choices as much as possible eliminates potential hesitation. "Refine your options with two results," says more. "If there are fewer options, your decision can become clearer." This tactic is particularly useful when you try to choose one in a pool of a lot to buy a new car when your option list is in both digits.

"If you are undecided, there is usually a fear of making the wrong gesture, feeling responsible if other people involved did not have a good time, or maybe even think that the other party knows better," saysSheila Tucker, an associated marriage and a family therapist and the owner ofTips of Spirit and Soul In Hilton Head Island, South Carolina.

So, the next time you work through a difficult decision that could affect others - like leaving your job - just remember that it is a decision you need to come yourself.

Yes, your choices are yours alone and should not be strongly influenced by those around you. However, more will suggest asking for advice from a trusted friend or family member to facilitate your indecision.Look for someone you trust Can not only help you make your decision ultimate, but it can also affirm the conclusion that you have come to yourself. Having someone look at your situation as a stranger can give you a perspective that you may not have taken into account otherwise.

Do not forget that the moment you said yes to this unexpected invitation on the fly and that you had the best moment? Well, like Tucker emphasizes, you can use this same thingcarelessness Towards decision-making with respect to the profound aspects of your life too. "Do not try externating the result of your decisions," she says. "It's easy to get caught in the spiral of what could go wrong, but at the end of the day, you do not have total control over situations or other people. Looking back at the time where your decision-making has proved. With yourconfidence in the present moment. "

Although you are not too wasting too much time at each small decision of your life, you should at least do your homework for you to know, with some precision, how each component of the decision will affect your short term and objectives In the long run - especially if you do something that involves financial logistics (such as, for example, leaving a position of staff to become an independent contractor).

"If you are undecided about something, it usually means that you are very stressed and full of anxiety because of a lack of understanding and awareness of the decision," says the blogger of financesScott Bates. "The best way to manage is to find more knowledge in this area and not helping me that you are not full of confidence. Then you can make a snapped decision and the right after that."

Although you know that you are flawing that you are good enough to succeed in the end, doubts and insecurities that posed dormants in your brain are sure to show action when you are about to take a great Decision, like picking a daycare renowned for your first child. When this happens inevitably, make sure to work in your internal conflicts before making your decision.

"By implementing positive affirmations throughout your day, logging or even therapy, you can reduce the critical voice of insecurity and increase your decide," saysMaryann W. Mathai, a clinical advisor helping customers in New York, Connecticut and Ohio. "I use logging to take stock of the automatic negative thoughts that flock and crop them in more positive and realistic statements on myself."

Decisions are less frightening when you can get an overview of your repercussions, good or bad, could be. So, before making a determination, try taking your options for a road test. "Allow yourself to test a decision," saysBelinda Ginter, an emotional kinesiologist and a state of mind. "Decisions become less frightening when you give yourself permission that if it does not feel the right or work for you, you will quickly review and make a different decision."

Of course, it only works for small-scale life decisions. But if you simply try, for example, choose a new yoga class, test a few options can be a major bargain.

Just like any other skill in life, being decisive takes practice, saysDr. Fran Walfish, a family psychotherapist and relations based on Beverly Hills and the author ofThe parent's parent. She suggestsdecay By making small decisions without importance, such as trying a new laundry detergent brand or by regularly on a new coffee place. By practicing how to make decisions as soon as possible, the greatest decisions will no longer need anguished days of reflection.

"Start small," said Walfish. "Once you have mastered small decisions, you can grow from there."

According toCharrusila Grace, a life coach and a healer of energy in Los Angeles, California, behind each decision (important or not) is a fear of the unknown. In the decision-making process, it is likely that you are going to be on the opinions of others and the way the decision will affect the rest of your life - and it's completely normal. To facilitate any anxiety as a result of an indecision, Grace recommends asking yourself a few key questions before drawing conclusions.

"My first tip to overcome the indecision is to take a piece of blank paper and writing at the top:" If there was no consequence for my decision, if the money was not an object, and if Everyone I love was going to be totally happy with my decision, what would I do? "" she says. In addition, Grace recommends to ask you the following questions:

• What are the potential consequences of which I am more afraid?
• What is the worst thing that could happen?
• What is the best possible result?
• How does my life change for the best if this positive result occurred?

"This process gives you all the general information you need and brings you closer to the reason why this question or decision is so important for you," says Grace.

Once again, the largest roadblock at the choice is fear, whether it is fear associated with the manufacture of an incorrect movement or, at its worst, the fear of doing everything. TOcircumventing everything preventing the fear of failure,Hassan Alnassir- entrepreneur and the founder of the educational toy societyBonus joy In California - suggests taking risks often.

"To be hesitant to make decisions is mainly due to the fear of failure or not to get it perfectly, especially when the money is involved," says Alnassir. "To become less undecided, you should always participate in activities that include risks such as developing a business, trading in stock, or even climbing trees. Perform risk tasks helps to dissolve your fear of making mistakes and you makes it possible to make more firm makeup. Your mind about things when needed. "

If you face a major decision - think about a new city or to change jobs - it is best to imagine what could be the worst absolute scenario. Then prove yourself that it's not so bad.

Nicole Herrera, a wedding and family therapist in Denver, Colorado, says you should push yourself to "make an agreement match plan, even in this situation."

Your intestine got you that far, then listen to it. "Indecision is often due to the intolerance of uncertainty and having too many options," saysDr. Jamie Long, a clinical psychologist atThe Psychology Group in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. "The more we have options that we have, the more we can become undecisive, it is important to strive to quickly improve the quick prioritization options and to rely a little on your intestine. It is In fact a very great resource. "

One of the worst aspects of decision-making deals with the uncertainty that will continue a new way in your life. But, as long, learn how to deal with this uncertainty can make you a better decision maker at the end. "To better tolerate uncertainty, accept that regardless of the decision you do, there is no guarantee that it will be the best after more than more time and more information is revealed," she says. "To deal with the anxiety of this, use a positive self-conversation to reassure you that even if you do not make the best decision, you will actually face the decision you made."

The best way to come with a choice is to stand up - no matter what. "Once you made a decision on where to go on vacation, what apartment for rent, what to wear, or what to order in a restaurant, simply believe that you made the right choice," saysChristine Scott-Hudson, a psychotherapist and an owner ofCreate your life studio. "Decide that it was the best absolute choice, the right choice for you, and it will be. Do not give you another thought." And for more advice on decision-making, be sure to avoid these20 financial decisions that you are guaranteed to regret.

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