15 natural presses that you should always be able to recognize and fight
It can be perfectly natural to want to do these things, but you should not.
Humans are curious creatures. We are impregnated with reason and ethics and our intelligence has allowed us to cure the disease, build ever larger cities and travel in distant planets. But when it comes up, we are still animals with all the inconvenience that it implies, and that animal presses are not integrally part of whom we are.
Without becoming too philosophical or religious, the fact is that most of these invigoged, while perhaps have been used once a precious purpose, are not fully useful for the modern person. Here are 15 natural presses to monitor and how to make them check. And to check your desires at the door and become more confident, avoid doing them15 daily habits that kill your confidence.
1 Eat when others eat
"In a culture of coffee dates, work lunches and a networking of cocktail hours, it can be easy to ignore our body signals and eat just to fulfill a social norm," saysNaphatali Roberts, an authorized marriage and a family therapist. Similarly, if a friend orders another drink, we are likely to order another of this social obligation, rather than because we feel like one ourselves.
Instead of leaving this type of mirroring dictating the amount and frequency with which we eat and drink, Roberts recommends: "Pause, sweeping and choosing by your body versions Social standards releases individuals to treat their body with respect, But also have room to engage events mentioned above in a more injectable state. "And kissing a healthier lifestyle, try them100 ways to be a man (a lot) healthier.
2 Cheat on your partner
Although you also want to bend the rules to get an advantage, this desire is often rooted in simple biology: our hormones lead our attraction to new and different and can make us lose interest in the person who was there For us years, if not decades. It is natural to feel a desire to try something new - but it's not healthy.
"The best way to cope with this desire is to identify yourself in its ugly head and hit the pause button," says Stephanie Lincoln, authorized mental health advisor and expert in food psychology, as well as the owner of the Fitness organizationTeam whiskey. "Take a step back and start writing the things you have and what you like or love what you have. This lady who walks can have a big body, but your spouse can be kind, funny and a Beautiful mother to your kids. Are things more useful for you a big body? Yes, of course. "Also, do not even think to download Tinder - it's one of the20 social media habits that technically cheat.
3 Cheat in competition
"A competitive advantage is also rooted in our biology," says Lincoln. "Darwin's theory of the survival of the most suitable is based on this principle. Our species was both in competition with other species and other groups of the same species for resources and therefore survive. The desire to 'get something better than what we have or get something more than someone else can lead to desires. "
But this flexion of the rules can cause long-term damage to our social relations and harm our ability to legitimately improve performance in the coming years. The cutting corners could win us the immediate race against competitors, but usually means losing the race that really matters - the one with ourselves. And for more ways to stay honest, try themThe best ways to be more conscious.
4 Eat too much
Our bodies are built for scarce management - to eat as much as possible when there is food to eat and store fat so we can survive with mauste times. But while it might have served us with cave days, the healthiest behavior is not the healthiest.
"So, while we examine this 4th piece of pizza that we can not seem to resist, how can we overcome our genetics?" Ask to Lincoln, which points to the conscious field of restoration of psychology. "Before eating, evaluate if you are really hungry. On a scale of 1 to 4 (1 being hungry of 4 being full), where are you? Unless you are a 1 or a 2, do not eat. And only Never eat until reaching a "3" on the scales. Once you have reached a 3, stop. "
Another conscious eating skill is to avoid eating in front of television or your smartphone or while working.
"Sit down, pay attention to the task of eating. People who do it tend to eat less during the meal than those who eat distracted," she says.
5 Buy impulsively
Like impulse-snack, but probably more expensive, this desire to acquire or get the same thing as your friends are totally natural and rooted in our social instincts. But while you want to have the same quality (or better) quality of clothes and gadgets like your friends and rivals, it can quickly spray in a buying saké and leave you in a serious debt.
Be smart, create a budget and hold it. This does not mean that you can not buy good things, but, just like your shopping list, should be scheduled and not done on the instinct. And all you do, do not spend a penny on the40 things more than 40 years old should never buy.
6 Listen to negative thoughts
Negative thoughts come from a positive location: self-criticism is generally rooted to try better ourselves or avoid dangers - and not all physical. Thinking "This shirt looks terrible on me" can be healthy if you get you dress and look sharper. But if such negative thoughts begin to dominate your mind, it can be very malad.
"Over time, these thoughts can destroy our self-esteem and our vision of life, even our health," said J. Plosker, a social worker and a college instructor. "The first step to stop them is to notice when they arise. When you feel the upcoming negativity, recognize it, then try to pass it; 2) replace it with a positive thinking; or 3) crop the situation And see it in a new light. "
He adds that even if it's not a magical healing, she can devote sensitization over time so that these negative thoughts do not become the norm. Instead, try these15 positive body affirmations that actually work.
7 Avoid taking risks
Similar to self-critical thoughts, our minds sometimes moves us from taking action, rooted in a natural desire to avoid taking risks likely to hurt ourselves. But now that we are no longer going to fight animals or other people regularly, the alarm bells take place in our minds are more often exaggerated or unnecessary. If we leave our desire for comfort prevent us from trying something new, it prevents us from learning or improving long-term.
"New has not always been unhealthy or dangerous," says Naphthai Roberts. "Evolutionally, we are scheduled to flee or fight against new things. If we are diverted by a flight response to new ones, new ones will be new or trying things that are finally beneficial or change of life. "
8 The fear is missing
Speaking of alarm bells, we will better ignore, Fomo can often be one of the strongest and least useful.
Humans are social animals and expelled from the tribe could present very real dangers to our ancestors. But today, it comes more often in the form of not having an invitation to a party or to learn after the fact that some friends have done something without us. It hurts, of course, but it's not life or death. If you feel that your fear of disappearing is out of control, plan to honestly express your concerns to your friends or add new social connections to your life so that you do not place so much about these others who do not seem Not too worried about getting clogged at what they do.
9 Struggle
The other side of the combat or theft reaction is, of course, is fighting. Although it is important to stick for yourself and your loved ones, and natural to feel angry when you or their lack of respect, it's rare nowadays of our day and need to solve All about fists. If you are the type that does not go back to a fight, consider the consequences that can result from a wrong punch and redeem your action plan. If the management of anger is a problem, try relaxation exercises. Sit straight, close your eyes and take deep breaths. Imagine a beach - and with every expiration, imagine you release your tension in the air in front of you.
10 Feel overwhelmed
Whether at the end of a long day or in the middle of a particularly intense project at work, it is natural to feel overwhelmed, as the work will crush you or you have to miss the door and as far as it too possible. But when this type of stress is not uncommon, it is often misguided - there is little it's reallythis overwhelming, once you have some perspective on it.
In order to get this perspective, try to take some deep breaths, which can work miracles to help you "get out of it" and focus on the task in hand. If it does not work, you may need to delegate certain tasks or adjust your deadlines, but panic will benefit anyone.
11 Postpone
Why do today what you can put back to next week? The desire to procrastinate is often rooted in an avoidance of the negative feelings of stress that we feel when we try to face a difficult task or fears that we can do bad. This is a comprehensible impulse and can often have a self-directive trend: the more we put something, the more likely it is that we will not do it as well as if we touched it earlier. While entire books have been written on the overcutting of procrastination, one of the simplest ways to move on to this desire is: instead of worrying about the finish of a project, you simply focus on the made available.
12 Be perfect for
Perfectionism is a slightly modified version of procrastination - a desire to avoid ending something until we feel that it's exactly correct ... what it may never be. We constantly modify and violate something for fear that it is not quite perfect and that the process lose the track of the largest image, missing deadlines or too simple that we did. This can be a difficult instinct to overcome, but reminding you that "the perfect is the enemy of good" is probably a good start.
13 Catch snacks in the check-out alley
You know the situation: you charged your grocery cart with healthy items and you are ready to make healthy meals at home, but you arrive at this starting driveway and locate colorful candy bars.
"Pulse purchases are presses that have hurt snickers have taken advantage of this with their announced slogan" Do not go anywhere? Catch a snicker, "says Jerry Snider, who runsAll in health and well-being.
It is totally natural to be distracted by delicious snacks, even if they are terrible for you. But to avoid making the purchase of something you do not need, Snider suggests making your shopping list dictate your purchases and refocusing about it when you feel the desire to grab something else.
"Hold your list in front of you and double check your articles," he says. "If all on your list is sitting on the conveyor belt ready to be scanned, tell you that you have finished your purchases. Keep repeating only in your head if you owe it. When you convince yourself, you are finished with some thing, in this case shopping, you are much less likely to add something else. "
14 Watch too much entertainment
Similar to supporting snacks you do not really need, we are used to keep watching TV or surfing the Internet long after our brains moved to the autopilot. The predictability and comfort of these activities create an endorphin rush to our brains, but also eats our day and encourages sedentary uselessness. To overcome it, Snider suggests a similar solution to which it advises to avoid buying unnecessary snacks.
"How many times did you say" after this show, I'm going to turn off the TV "and did not do it?" he asks. "Draw the line and do not cross it. Be careful not to add warning to your" I finished "phrase".
15 Gossip
The basket to talk about someone behind the back can be extremely satisfactory and offers many emotional benefits in the short term, to give you a sense of superiority to help define and affirm particular social norms. But over time, it can also have a degrading effect on friendships and connections and you leave a little dirty. Instead, when you feel the temptation to crack a joke about someone's social ineptitude, think about the question of whether you would tell them their faces and how you would feel if you do it. If you are always gossip in your last years, you can have these20 best teenage habits Elder people still have.
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