This bedtime could end your relationship, says a new study
A third of people think it's a dealbreaker.
The night routines are important. Maybe you are used to brewing a cup of hot tea before turning off the lights. Or, you read for at least 10 minutes before closing your eyes. It could even be as simple as lighting a white noise machine or snuggle up with your dog in the moments before hitting the sheets. But in addition to creating an evening routine for you as an individual, you will also want to develop one for you and your partner. And when you create this routine, there is one thing you want to avoid, according to new research. Continue to read to find outhabit of achieving relationships And hear expert advice for bedtime practices that will improve your partnership rather than drain them.
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Your bedtime routine can strengthen your link.
Before entering the bedroom habit which can damage your relationship, it is important to note that this time can also be used to improve it. "Staying connected in relationships requires taking the time to adapt to each other and reconnect," explainsAngela Amias, Lcsw, therapist in couple and co-founder ofLove alchemy. "When it is calm and there is no distractions, it can be useful to take some time for an intimate conversation."AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB
That said, you will want to be proactive to avoid distractions. "Using your phone or watching a show while you fall asleep is a missed opportunity to feed your relationship," says Amias. She suggests putting your devices in standby mode at least 30 minutes before planning to fall asleep to focus on reconnection significantly.
Doing this in bed can ruin your relationship.
The habit at bedtime that could have a negative impact on your relationship is to eat in bed. According to a studyShared in the speaker and led by OnePoll forBedding Serta Simmons, a third of the respondents said it was a control relationship if their partner ate in bed. On the other hand, 35% of respondents admitted having eaten in bed themselves. The millennial generation was most likely to find particularly offensive behavior. Curiously, they are also the generation that eats the most in bed.
It seems that it is the mess that eating in a leaf bed which is most annoying. Four in five respondents "say that the crumbs in the bed give them the most crumpled sleep." The most common snacks includeCookies, fries and popcorn, who are all creators of defined crumbs.
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You should also avoid arguing in bed.
Another thing you want to avoid in the minutes before bedtime is to engage in arguments. "I know that the saying" is not going to sleep angry "is fairly common, but sometimes staying awake to continue an argument is only getting worse," saidElyssa Helfe, LMFT, wedding and family therapist approved atHigh healing center. "If we are tired, we probably do not communicate in the most effective way, which can keep a fight to drag without resolution."
If you must have the discussion in the moment, Helfer suggests leaving the room to do so. "Our rooms are intended for rest, privacy and peace," she said. By taking your conflict elsewhere, you can help him stay like this.
Take time for gratitude.
You may already have a personal practice of gratitude. But how about adding a relationship focused on the relationship to your evening routine? "I encourage couples to list one to two things that they were grateful for that day regarding their relationship," advises Helfer. "This allows not only increased connection and compassion, but encourages individuals to start paying particular attention to the way their partner improves their daily life."
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And remember little things.
Other aspects of your evening routine are also important - andClaudia Delgado, LCSW, ainfidelity, suggest making a habit. A few things that she recommend is spending 10 to 15 minutes a day to ask and listen to the days of the other, saying good night with a hug and a kiss, sharing a kiss of at least three times per Week before going to bed, watching a show while touching physically, and doing an activity of an hour once a week, such as playing a board game or making a dessert.
"If the little things are ignored, the relationship can start to weaken," says Delgado. "This can create many problems that can lead to separation thoughts." Conversely, building a routine that strengthens your link can help you feel confident, happy and reassured in your partnership. This can also mean that a misstep (like a cookie in bed!) Will not be a dealbreaker.