It is normal to lie about this "secret" behavior to your partner, says a new study
There are things that they just don't need to know.
Most of us try to be as honest as possible as often as possible. This is good for our relationships - including those platonic, family and romantic - and also for our conscience. But sometimes saying a FIB is necessary. For example, when your friend asks you if her shoes correspond to her dress once she has already arrived at an event or when your mother asks you if you have received her five-page email ("HM, he must be went to my spam file "). However, keep secrets in your relationshipis often taboo. However, a recent study revealed that there was one thing that suits FIB. In fact, it could even strengthen your link. In advance, discover the results of the study, as well as the opinions of therapists on the issue.
Read this then:5 signs that your partner does not trust you, according to the therapists.
Sometimes white lies are correct in a relationship.
White lies, by definition, are harmless and trivial and are often informed to avoid harming someone's feelings. In a relationship, they may seem to tell your partner that you like their tie (even if you feel me on this subject) or that the dress of their bridesmaid is magnificent (even if it has a striking resemblance to a bag) .
So how do you know that when you crossed the line of a white lie to a harmful lie? "If you feel worried about the level of transparency around certain problems, you may need to clean your partner," explainsTrisha Andrews,,Authorized and family wedding therapist And sex based in Denver. "I use the pillow test: if you put your head on your pillow at night and you start to replay an interaction with your partner of which you feel guilty or unfortunate, you should probably revisit it with them in the morning." Your feelings of discomfort could be a sign that you have gone too far.
Read this then:Doing this with your hands makes people trust you, say the experts.
A recent study revealed that you are lying to your partner is quite well.
Lying on major purchases can affect your relationship. But, according to a 2022 study published in theJournal of Consumer Psychology, Lying on insignificant - like candies or a shirt that is in serious sale - could in fact benefit your relationship.
"In our study, we found that 90% of people recently kept daily consumption behavior one secret of another - like a friend or a spouse - even if they also report that they do not think that their partner would care if they knew it, "said the author of the co-election studyKelley Gullo Wight, assistant marketing professor at the University of Indiana, in auniversity release. "Even if most of these secret acts are quite ordinary, they can always - implied - involve the relationship."
So how does it work? Researchers have discovered that these small sly purchases often lead to slight feelings of guilt. These feelings can push the secret to investing more in their relationship. For example, they can spend more on a Valentine's Day gift or go everything to plan a birthday dinner. You get the essentials.
Therapists agree that the hiding place of certain purchases is acceptable.
Hiding certain purchases is good, but you will want to give them a reference at the start of your partnership. "I recommend that couples offer an agreed number ($ 50, $ 500, $ 5,000) for purchases they don't need to chat with their partner," said Andrews. In this way, you will be able to feel confident to buy this new mobile phone or a cute decoration article without asking you what your partner will think.
This should be part of a wider conversation on finance. "Most couples enter into partnership with variable relationships with money, budgets and expenses," explains Andrews. "It is important to talk about the place where each of them comes from the state of mentality: they grew up with a state of mind of abundance or a state of mind of rarity? This will affect the way way of which they present themselves with the purchasing limits. " From there, you can discuss money from a more empathetic and understanding point of view.
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But you should be transparent with most purchases.
In the end, you will want to share most of your purchases with your partner, especially adults. "The purchases you never hide from your partner are those who would put the couple in financial danger, those you know that your partner would disapprove of, and finally, I will come back to the pillow test: if you feel guilty at the end of During the day, trust your intestine, be courageous and admit to your partner that you have made a unilateral decision that must be discussed, "explains Andrews. AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB
Although it can be uncomfortable, this is something you want to do quickly. "It is better to be honest early than to repair the violation of confidence later," notes Andrews.
