Good Lifestyle

In our worst moments, anyone can be selfish, right or lacking empathy for others. However, there is a difference between behavioral failures and a pathological diagram . When taken to extreme and unfavorable features like these can reflect a more important problem. In fact, they could be a sign that someone you know - a partner, a friend or a family member - is actually a clinically diagnostic narcissist.

The closer your relationship with this person, the more complicated it can be to sail in their narcissistic features. "It can be difficult to maintain healthy borders and protect your mental health in the face of self -centeredness and the manipulation of a narcissist," said Najamah Davis , MSW, LCSW, psychotherapist for ND Counseling Services .

The first step is to spot the problem and call it by name. In order to meet the criteria of narcissistic personality disorder (NDP), a person must meet five new symptoms, according to the Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders, fifth edition (DSM-5).

However, to confirm your suspicions and better understand the member of your family, you can also benefit from a professional perspective. "The search for therapy or advice can help you develop adaptation strategies and learn to set healthy limits with a member of the narcissistic family. It is also essential to prioritize your well-being and reduce your exposure to toxic behaviors and interactions, "says Davis Better life.

Concerned that someone in your family can have these traits? It is the nine red flags that could mean that you are linked to a narcissist.

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The narcissists tend to make a good first impression, to identify power and confidence when they meet new people. However, those who are closest to the narcissists, including family members, are generally aware on the other hand of their personality.

Davis says that their fundamental lack of empathy for others makes it difficult for them to maintain significant ties. "The narcissists are often unable to understand and sympathize with the feelings of others, making them seem emotionally cold and insensitive," she says Better life.

"A narcissist will not be able to get to your shoes and imagine the situation from your point of view," agrees Alyse Freda-Colon , LCSW, founder of AFC therapy . "They see it from their point of view, and this is the only perspective that matters to them. They are right, you are wrong - for the end of the story."

If you are linked to a narcissist, you may notice that the family member in question is abnormally self-centered.

"The narcissists have an inflated feeling of self-importance and believe that they are superior to the others," explains Davis.

Freda-Colon adds that this often means that they can only look at situations from the point of view of how they are personally affected. She shares an example of a situation that could make you switch to this trait.

"Let's say that you tell your narcissistic husband that you could lose your job. A support spouse and loving would probably sympathize with you, would console you and discuss your feelings and your plans with you," she explains. "A narcissist will probably only be concerned about how they will be affected, saying things like:" Well, what about our health insurance? How are we going to pay our bills? What am I supposed to tell people when they ask me what my spouse does?

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At first glance, it may seem that the greatest fault of a narcissist always loves too much. However, Studies have shown that there are in fact "two faces of narcissism" and only a few The narcissists are motivated by a surfed sense of self. Others are in fact motivated by an underlying feeling of self-disgust that encourages them to seek the external validation, attention and adulation of others.

"The narcissists can go for extreme purposes to attract attention and admiration, sometimes even at the cost of injuring others," explains Davis.

In practice, this may appear to be an excessive boastful, taking credit for the efforts of others or other behaviors for researching attention.

Because a narcissist is mainly concerned or exclusively with their own needs, it is not uncommon for them to exploit others to reach their way.

"The narcissists often use manipulation tactics to get what they want, such as the trigger for guilt, gas lighting and emotional blackmail," explains Davis.

If you notice this particular feature, which is easily lends to mistreatment, it is particularly important to set limits and recognize the limits of the relationship.

"It is very difficult to have a reciprocal and mutually beneficial relationship with a narcissist. In their minds, you are there to meet their needs, and what You Need is not much important, "explains Freda-Colon.

Having a feeling of law means that you feel a special treatment, even if you haven't done anything in particular to deserve it. This is common in the narcissics, warn the experts.

"The narcissists feel right to special treatment and privileges, and they can get angry or resentment when their requests are not satisfied," said Davis.

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Many narcissists are focused only on their own grandiose "success, power, perfect love, beauty or shine," says the DSM-5. These fantasies are often not rooted in current reality, but they help support the idea that the individual is more special than the others.

Although this distortion can cause friction in relationships, Freda -Colon says that a real narcissistic is unlikely to change in a way: "With narcissism, they don't even see that they have to change - that's all world that should change.

In the words of the DSM-5, people with narcissistic personality disorder tend to have attitudes towards others who are "arrogant" or "disdainful". In practice, this may mean that your family member often plans you.

"The narcissists can be quick to judge and criticize others, lower them often and make them feel inferior," explains Davis.

If you notice this trait in someone, experts say that it is important to remember that you do not have to receive or internalize its negativity.

Although they are very critical of others, the narcissists generally fail to examine their own actions in a critical way. Rather than standing responsible for their own choices, they blame others rather for their failures or their mistakes, explains Davis.

"They are defensive and perceive threats even when they are not there," agrees Freda-Colon. "They often project their anxiety on others and accuse them of the very thing as they do: to be rebellious or closed in mind. They are unable to see their own role in a dysfunction or a relationship problem, therefore It's always your fault. "

In relation: 10 red flags your friend is a narcissist, say the therapists .

People with narcissistic personality disorders tend to have another destructive feature: "narcissists can become envious of the success and achievements of others, leading them to adopt competitive or destructive behavior", explains Davis.

If you notice that your loved ones are not favorable or undergo when things are going well, it may be a sign that they feel that their own feeling of superiority is threatened.

The narcissists generally believe that they are unique and superior to the others and only want to associate with other people whom they consider to have an equally high status. AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB

"The narcissists often have a distorted vision of themselves and their capacities, which makes them difficult to recognize their faults and its limits," explains Davis.

Underlying this is a deep lack of self-awareness. "They think they are still right," said Freda-Colon. "They take credit for something good and blame the rest on someone or something else. They do not have the capacity to be introspective or to see their role in a conflict or a situation - that's all or Nothing."

If you notice this trait, the therapist recommends putting a distance between you and the family member in question. "You can try to limit your interactions with them, find other people to train your team and have your needs responded outside this person. The most important thing to remember is that they will not change," explains Fredda -Colon.

Although you can urge the person to ask for professional help, don't forget that you cannot force them to improve. Instead, your main goal should be on your own mental and support health systems, which will put You On the path of healing.