Good Lifestyle

When you go to a date, You know the basic behaviors to note: they appear late without excuses, they make inappropriate jokes, or they continue to watch their phone, to name a few examples. However, some less obvious signs may indicate that your date is actually a narcissist. Fortunately, Alina Kastner , MSC, Couples and sex therapist And specialist in narcissistic violence, shares three red flags that you are at an appointment with a narcissist. Continue to read for his advice to find out what to look for.

In relation: 5 red flags your partner handles you, the therapists say .

Kastner, who shares her Tiktok advice , said that the first red flag to watch is that you immediately have the impression of having encountered your soul mate.

"If you feel super excited, on the edge, you know, all this anxiety ... This is not what you should feel," she explains.

You will want to feel calm and safe with the person you see, because these feelings are indicators of a healthy relationship. "You should have the impression of having arrived at a very intimate energy and not an exciting energy," adds Kastner.

If your meeting "complies you to the extreme" or says superficial things like "you are the one I expected" or "you are beautiful", Kastner stresses that they can be bomb .

It is a form of manipulation that narcissists often use to ensure that their partner "feels as the most special person in the" "" world " Laura Wasser , an expert in relation and head of the evolution of divorce to Divorce.com , previously explained to Better life . "But the fact is that it is not authentic - it's just a ploy to keep their partner hung and under their thumb." AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB

On the other hand, when you go out with a healthy person, you will speak and they will ask questions to get to know you better, explains Kastner. When the conversation is only focused on superficialities like your appearance, you are probably out with a narcissist.

Kastner says that the last thing to watch is if your appointment does not plan unrealistic for the future, assuming that you have already decided about them.

"He invites you on vacation six months later in your first week to be together," she said as an example. It may seem exciting and flattering for the moment, but it is a major red flag. "What to do ... ask you for your next meeting," says Kastner.

If you are in a situation like this, she advises to take a step back and ask you if they make enough efforts with the current state of your relationship or if everything is at the surface level.

In relation: I am a psychologist and it is 5 direct signs that someone is a control partner .

In a separate video , Kastner quickly dissipates the false idea that narcissists choose "weak" people to date. "The narcissists love to choose a strong person," she said.

Someone who has a solid career, confidence and a good support system is a likely target. "It is because it is so much more fun to take this strong person and decompose them by nothing as to take someone who is already weak," she explains, warning people with these qualities of Do not think that they will not fall for this kind of thing. "

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