8 red flags that report cheating, therapists warn

These apparently harmless behaviors can be signs of infidelity.


Nothing can make you feel crazy in a relationship than if you suspect that your partner cheats. You suddenly wonder if they really go where they say they are going, send sms that say they send sms, and if these flowers they have brought, you are a affection or guilt. To help you analyze these subtle suspicions, we asked therapists the best red flags they notice when a cheating partner. Read the rest to discover what they say to search.

In relation: 4 signs that your partner will never cheat, according to the therapists .

1
They shower more often than usual.

Woman using sponge in the shower.
Yakobchukolena / istock.com

A mid-life change in hygiene habits could be benign, but it could also be a sign that your partner hides something. AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB

"When someone tries to hide sex with another partner, he often takes care to wash the new perfume," said Bat Sheva Marcus , PHD, Approved clinical social worker .

Although this red flag does not automatically mean that your other significant cheating - they may have simply picked up their intensity at the gymnasium or decided to take the cleanliness more seriously - that is to be noted, in particular in combination with others unusual behavior changes.

2
They have a friend who is going through a crisis.

Unhappy lesbian couple sitting on sofa in living room
istock

If your partner, who is generally not the empathetic type and shoulder-to-cry, disappears frequently to "help a friend" who crosses something, it could be a red flag of infidelity.

"Most likely, what his friend is going through is to be covered for the cheating of your partner," said Paul Deomo , Psyd, Abpp, director of Cognitivo-behavioral therapy Institute from southern California.

This behavior could also be combined with your partner telling you that it would be unfair for them not to console their friend. "They want Gaslight You Do not be "selfish" to want their time, "explains Depompo.

In relation: 6 Red flags cheating to search for photos with your partner .

3
They accuse You cheating.

Boris Jovanovic / Istock

Alena Scigliano ,, approved psychotherapist And a clinical expert in narcissistic abuse, says that one of the most common signs of cheating that she noticed when he works with victims of survivor of narcissistic abuse is when the person who cheats accuses their partner cheating.

"For the narcissists, it is both a form of projection and distraction, which makes it less obvious of a sign," she said. "The non -Chéting partner goes so much energy focusing on the defense and trying to convince the other person she does not cheat, that she does not even consider that the accusations are probably a sign that her narcissistic partner is the one who is really cheating. "

The search for professional help can be your best lead in this situation.

4
They strongly keep their mobile phone.

Couple on couch with cell phones
Prostock-Studio / Shutterstock

This sign of cheating is a cliché because it is so often true.

"People with secret business will frequently change their passwords or become agitated at the idea of defining their phone," said Ashera Derosa ,, Authorized and family wedding therapist And owner of a private cabinet in Buffalo, New York. "They can change their settings so that they do not have notifications or do not allow their partner to use their phone to change the music or even use navigation during driving."

Their fear, of course, is that their partner will find digital evidence of their business on their aircraft.

In relation: 5 questions that your partner can ask if they cheat, the therapists say .

5
They have a new hobby.

morning workout, person getting ready to workout
Tero Vesalainen / Shutterstock

Of course, it is completely possible that your partner joined a bowling league or started a reading club. But if something seems basic on this subject, it could be a red flag. Usually, a questionable hobby requires a lot of time and is done alone, says John P. Carnesecchi ,, Approved clinical social worker and founder and clinical director of Gateway to Solutions.

"The most common is to go to the gymnasium, to run or to intensive physical training," explains Carnesecchi. "When you want to talk about their new hobby, they will be vague from their progress and what they do."

On the other hand, Carnesecchi notes that people who are truly devoted to a hobby will be arranged and capable of sharing all the details.

6
They surpass.

Unhappy senior black couple standing in kitchen while wife points finger
istock

When people lie, they tend to extend too much, adding details where they would not do so if they were telling the truth. The same goes for cheaters.

"When someone asks:" How was your evening with your friends? "The cheater enters the specific details, names and things that may or may not happen - telling almost a whole story," says Carnesecchi. "In their minds, they have covered all the bases like an alibi."

In relation: 7 signs of body language which means that your partner cheats, according to the therapists .

7
They withdraw from you.

latino man comforting upset latino woman in bed
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"If a partner cheats, most likely, all his energy enters the other person, especially if it is a case in progress," explains Lee Phillips , LCSW, certified sex therapist and couple . You may notice that your partner does not pay you as much attention, or he can openly refuse to be intimate with you.

And their withdrawal of you can also cause communication changes. "They do not seem present, the cheating partner must ask several times if their partner hears them, and the cheating partner can avoid conversations or can be very defensive when asked questions," said Phillips.

When they become closed like this or absent in several areas of the relationship, it could be time to force serious conversations.

8
They act too loving.

Romantic Man giving flower and gift box to woman for valentines day
Adriaticfoto / Shutterstock

Of course, no one wants their partner withdraws from them, but the other extreme acts Also carefully. When a partner cheats or hides something from his partner, he often acts more loving and more pleasant, explains Kiara Luna , LMHC, mental health therapist approved at I knew you psychotherapy .

"They would even buy them gifts or surprised them with random outings, or ideas they know that their partner would appreciate it, and they would generally do it because they have a guilty conscience," she said.

If you notice that your partner acts differently or if you are exaggerated, you should have an open and honest conversation where you express your concerns.

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