Good Lifestyle

Being parents is undoubtedly one of the most demanding challenges in the world, there is no script to be respected and very often the error is around the corner. To prevent the mistakes from leaving profound emotional scars in children, the Canadian psychotherapist Morgan Pommells, specialized in childhood trauma, shared a list of behaviors on Instagram to be avoided to prevent emotional trauma in children. It is not a question of looking for perfection in the role of parents, but of providing children with a safe environment that some behaviors, even involuntary, could undermine. The expert, in fact, underlines how these errors are made at the level of the subconscious and only with active work can the danger be significantly reduced. Here are 10 behaviors to avoid according to the expert.

1. Consider their children as an extension of parents

Each person has their individuality and parents must not impose their opinion without listening to the needs and point of view of their children. This attitude can generate low self -consideration and will only feed anxieties and grudge.

2. Treat children incorrectly

The world is not always right and correct. This, however, does not put the parent in the position of treating their children incorrectly, with the incorrect idea of preparing them for injustices. Children must know they have a safe point of reference and an understanding and respectful environment.

3. Don't apologize to children

The parents, when they make a mistake, must always be ready to apologize to their children. The fact of being parents does not exempt them from the obligation to apologize if in wrong. This simple action can teach children the importance of responsibility and awareness of their actions.

4. avoid screaming against children

Scream, make strong or aggressive noises, or even completely ignore children, can endanger their nervous system and generate a constant state of alert and stress. It is essential for parents to regulate their emotions and not to make their children weigh their emotional status on their children.

5. expect the family to pay attention

We must not expect the family to be on who goes there when you are in a bad mood: this is one of those behaviors that can put children in constant tension. It is important to separate your emotions from other family members, trying to provide a safe and peaceful environment.

6. Do not protect children from the other parent

If the other parent does something harmful, it is important to protect children instead of exposing them to harmful situations. The parents, in fact, must avoid transmitting their disagreement or resentment to the other parent to children. This behavior can make children feel involved in situations by adults who should not concern them.

7. Search for emotional support from the little ones

Parents do not have to download their emotional problems on the shoulders of children. Priority must always be the safety and well -being of one's children.

8. Ask for gratitude for parental duty

Nourishing, looking after, warming and giving a roof to their children is a duty of parents, not a reason to request gratitude. Being parents is a duty from which you cannot deprive yourself and does not require any thanks.

9. Treat the brothers differently

This is an error that occurs when parents treat their children in an inequable way, clearly manifesting a preference: it is an attitude that can create tensions and feelings of injustice between the brothers, feeding grudges that can last for years.

10. Negative declarations on oneself

Phrases like "I am the worst mother in the world" when the children are injured can leave deep emotional scars in them. Often, these behaviors lead young people to seek the help of an adult psychotherapist.