Good Lifestyle

Do you feel a strong panic at the thought of emotional proximity? Avoid attachment? Afraid of being vulnerable in a relationship? If you are several of these symptoms, it is very likely that you suffer from Philophobia. In science, this term means a strong and irrational fear of falling in love. Read further to find out what reasons lead to the development of philophobia and how to overcome your own fear of proximity in order to move forward to a better life.

1. You are afraid to be vulnerable to another person

A demonstration of tender feelings and deepest fears can be frightening. Being vulnerable, you give another person a chance to hurt you. And this, of course, is terrifying you. However, to worry that your heart will be broken is quite normal. The main thing is to observe the balance.

2. New relationships cause you painful memories

Most phobias, including Philophobia, are actually protective mechanisms that the brain triggers to avoid pain. Previous traumatic experiences set the tone for these mechanisms. Fear of love is usually based on attachment. If in childhood a painful feeling of abandonment was present in your life, then in adulthood it could well develop into a total aversion to emotional closeness.

3. You feel unattractive

You think that you are not worthy of love and happiness. This condition is often caused by adopted grievances from early childhood, as well as the negative feelings that your parents nourished for themselves. In fact, the family and close relatives for most people are a kind of mirror in which they do not get tired of looking throughout their lives. The trouble is that few realize that it was originally crooked.

4. You have a fear of disappointment

You are afraid to give yourself all of yourself to another person, so as not to be disappointed and completely devastated. The paradoxical conviction that joy and pain go hand in hand, can also be one of the causes of Philophobia.

5. You are worried that you are not able to love someone really

The openness of a person to relations with others actually begins with his attitude to himself, or, more precisely, with how he perceives himself. You can consider yourself unworthy of love or, conversely, unable to provide someone with love. Perhaps in childhood you simply received an attitude that your feelings do not represent any value.

6. You are afraid to lose yourself in a relationship

Some women are afraid to fall in love, because it seems to them that relations will not give them the space in which they need to be themselves.

It will not work to overcome your fear of being in love in one night. This is a marathon, not a sprint. Most importantly, you do not need to immediately dive into a relationship as soon as you feel sympathy for another person. No need to rush. Give yourself time to think about your feelings, weigh values and build the basis for trust. Conscious efforts do not turn relations into routine. On the contrary, they help to be more open with their partner.