The 6 words that you should "never" tell your partner, according to a therapist

They can make your partner feel invalidated and harmed your long -term relationship.


We have all learned the "sticks and stones" as a child, and I hope you have worn this in adulthood: there is a good chance that you avoid shouting or being significant in the exterior for your significant other. Healthy relations are built onstrong communication, and it goes beyond being nice. It turns out that some of the things you say could make your partner believe that you are not interested in hearing what they feel. To prevent such roadblocks, there are six specific words that you should avoid, says a therapist. Read the rest to discover what you should "never" tell your partner.

Read this then:5 questions that your partner may ask you if they cheat, the therapists say.

The way you talk to your partner is critical.

husband and wife speaking
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Aside from physical attraction and intimacy, you want to feel an emotional link in your relationship, which is to be aware of what you say to your partner.

"The words are powerful and can have a negative or positive impact on your partner's self -feelings, its value / their value in the relationship, the level of vulnerability exposed - in state compared to dangerous perceived dynamics, their confidence in your Ability to support them, and much more, "Ellie Borden,,registered psychotherapist, certified life coach and clinical director of the mind by Design, saysBetter life.

When people feel good about themselves, they also feel satisfied with their relationship, adds Borden, and you can provide this support for your partner by building them verbally. Likewise, being cruel, you can demolish them and damage your connection. We have a general understanding of what would be mean to say, but you could pronounce certain sentences that you did not even realize.

These three words can make your partner insignificant.

woman upset at partner
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In a video of September 27 published on Tiktok,Dilyse Diaz, Lmft,approved psychotherapist And communication expert, warns that the first three words that you should never "say" say "are"You are so sensitive. ""

"This is a beautiful thing that your partner feels deeply," she said in the video, with several commentators adding that it is something they have heard before.

"I am told that I am too sensitive or that emotional illness gives me so much harm, it does not even make me want to talk about what I feel," wrote a commentator.

Kelly Whitaker,,communication coach, agree with Diaz to avoid comments "sensitive" or "too emotional", noting that it is a avoidance tactic and lack of compassion. "This comment is superimposed by negative connotations, from blame to judgment to condescension," explains Whitaker. "At worst, it is a gesture to try to control the emotional response of their partner, which can be a form of gas or emotional violence."

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You should never push your partner to move on.

couple fighting
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In addition to making your partner fall by calling them sensitive, it is also disdainful to tell your partner "move on, "Diaz adds a second video. By telling them to move on and say" everything will be fine ", you reject your partner again and insinuating that their feelings are not relevant.AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB

"Their feelings are also important," says Diaz. "If you think about it, it's your own anxiety that does not want to have your partner feeling these negative emotions."

Whitaker also echoes this, adding that the invalidation of someone's feelings is never an appropriate way to help someone work through something overwhelming or injuring. "Strong emotions must be recognized and treated; claiming that it is deleted or ignoring will only grow the problem," she said. "'During" essentially encourages someone to claim that this does not happen and burying negative emotion. ""

Fortunately, Diaz and Whitaker note that there is something you can say as an alternative.

Adopt a different approach to these situations.

showing compassion
DIY / Shutterstock

Diaz suggests coming from a place of understanding when your partner "feels a lot of emotions" and says something in the sense of "I can see that it is really difficult for you" or "I can see that you feel very strongly this. " Likewise, when your partner tries to work on something, Diaz says you should wonder how you can "support" them. "In this way, there are no riddles and no additional work on your part, but you have been very favorable and loving yourself," she adds.

Whitaker also suggests reassuring your partner of your feelings and recognizing their pain, namely letting them know that you are there for them and ready to help with everything they need.

That said, patience is a virtue, and sometimes people react impulsively. You might even think that you are useful if you believe that the problem at hand is not worth getting angry. Anyway, Borden stresses that "the way you pack your message is everything."

If you find that you are quick to reject emotions and tell your partner to move on, Borden recommends taking a second to consider your words and actions. "If you surprise yourself about to say these types of statements to your partner, stop and ask if you invalidate their experience and try to reformulate them to transmit understanding," she said.


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