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Emily, 40 years old and Albert, 62, have met for the first time by mutual friends at the age of 44 and she was 22 years old and married a few years later. "I do not think anyone thought we were going together," she said, "but we wereattracted to each other and had a lot to talk. "

Today, they have been together for 18 years, have two beautiful children and many ways would be considered as a "successful marriage". But, in private, Emily often wishes that she had married someone closer to her age. Read to find out why - and to hear the opposite, read howThis man married a younger woman and regrets it now.

When 22 years old, Emily first told his family and friends that she married a man twice his age, they were not happy.

"It was twice my age and my parents had major problems, especially because it only has less than a year younger than my mother," she says. "But what helped is that very shortly after our wedding, we moved to a place where no one knew one or the other of us, so that people no longer accepts the fact that We were together."

There is still a lot of social stigma surroundingage age relationshipsAnd that judgment does not always come from the peers of the old partner. In reality,a study Suggests that young people are more likely to assume that couples with a significant age gap have a transactional relationship (that is, sex or camaraderie in exchange for financial reward). Since Albert was much more established in a stable profession than it was, it was something Emily had to embarrass.

"I am a person type A, lively career, and I feel like sometimes people look at me like a person who marries a sugar dad," she says. "There is this hypothesis that it must be exploitative. People nowadays always say" you are doing you ", but I often do not want to feel that kind of relationship."

Emily and Albert were united on the fact that theyChildren's Winners. But Emily also believes that if she had married someone younger, she may not have finished having children from 24.

"Being with an older man definitely pushed me to have younger children than my demographics," she said, adding that she often looks like people "Look at her, look [she] The storage "to have his first child at a very young age." Even when we moved to Washington DC, where people are relatively open-minded, I felt like people gave me looks that said it : "Do not you know how to use birth control?" "

Emily says that foreigners often do not hypothesis that Albert is his father, possibly because they lived all over the world and outside the weddings of America between an older man and a big young woman younger are not as rare or stigmatized as they are here. But she says that people often think he's the grandfather of their children, who can "be a little uncomfortable for them".

Many women who marry older men also complain that their partner isLIBIDO WANES Just as they hit their sexual premium, which is very the case for Emily.

"He has definitely somedystem Problems, and I know that the youngest men also have them, but it becomes more widespread when you are older. And I would certainly have sex more often than he would do it, "she says.

Many couples in happy relationships of age gap say that your mental age is importing more than your chronological age. But Emily says that looking back now, 17 years later, she feels that she was much more emotionally immature she did not think it at the time.

"People always tell me that I was very adult, so I thought I was really mature. But our first year together was not great, and sometimes when I look at it now, I have the impression of 'Acting childish and I'm just did not realize it. "

"Albert is more" old school "in terms of male / female roles that I would guess men my age are," she says. "My mother says he treats children as a grandparent rather than a parent being an oversize and not as well with the discipline. He makes a lot of great decisions because he is" man ". And he was already established in his career as I started from; I followed his career for almost all my adult lives, which did not make me easy for me to build something mine. "

She noted, however, that there were capital letters to be in a marriage that was not quite equal, as the fact that she had never had to feel as if she wore the burden offinancial responsibility. "I have always lived in a nice place. I have always had money to travel. I have never crossed this phase of living in a room apartment and eating from Ramen."

While Emily could want to have been happier with a man closer to his age, she does not plan eitherDivorce your husband at any time soon.

"Marriage for me is very important as an institution and divorce is simply not an option for me because of my beliefs," she says. "But I had to come with the realization that I will spend a good part of my life as an elderly person alone ... or at least not with my current partner." And for more on the realities of an age gap relationship, see these25 things that couples with major age differences know.

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