You can not hold a relationship? Science says blame your mother

A new study highlights all our mom's problems.


If you have trouble making a relationship stick, it might not be just todayEngagement-Phobic culture to blame.

A new study of 7,152 people published inPlos aSuggests that our relationship models are strongly influenced by the success of our mothers when maintaining stable relationships.

The researchers investigated the data of the National Longitudinal Youth Survey 1979 and the Longitudinal Survey of the Child of Youth and Young Adults - who have both followed the participants for at least 24 years - and have found that men and women were often about the same number of serious romantic partners as their mother had.

While this long known that the people whose parents have divorced have a greater probability of divorcing themselves - andThe same goes for people whose parents have cheated-It results have shown that the same effect seemed true for cohabitation.

"It's not just divorce now. Many children see their divorce from their parents, start new relationships to coexist and also have these terms,"Claire Kamp DUSHAssociate Professor of Human Sciences at the University of Ohio State and the Copyright of the Study,noted. "All these relationships can influence the results of children, as we see in this study."

The researchers do not know why this is the case. A theory proposes that the economic difficulties generally associated with a single parenting can create a more difficult transition to adulthood and, subsequently, a more difficult time forming stable obligations. Another theory proposes that seeing your mother goes through a variety of breaks could result in privacy problems that make it more difficult to join.

Kamp Dush, however, believes in a third theory, and if she is right, it's a little depressing.

"Our results suggest that mothers may have certain characteristics that make them more or less desirable in the marriage market and better or worse in relations. Children inherit and learn these skills and behaviors and can take them in their own relationships", Has she declared. "It could be that mothers who have more partners do not have great relational skills or do not deal with the conflict, nor have mental health problems, everyone can undermine relationships and driving to an instability. Whatever the exact mechanisms, they can transmit these characteristics to their children, making the relationships of their children less stable. "

Put aside the clumsy use of the term"Wedding market"it seems a little rushed to conclude that, simply because a person has several partners in their lives, which means that they do not have "great relations" skills, especially since the most couples Fortunately married agree on the fact that there is a little luck involved in the search for that.

The study is also somewhat limited in its decision to focus solely on mothers, since many research indicated that your father's behavior had a strong influence in the kind of men you choose, your levels of self-esteem and your feeling of self-value. Not to mention that it is quite widely accepted in the psychiatric circles that your relationship withthe two From your parents is a solid indicator whether your anxiety, avoidable or secure fastening style, which is one of the determining factors in which we sail on our Love lives.

So, if your mother has married and divorced seven times, do not worry, you are not necessarily sentenced to the same destiny. But if you find yourself on the same relationship, one or more of your parents, this new study could give you something to think. And possibly raise therapy.

And if you have trouble looking for love, check theseAdvice supported by science on how to make the most of being single.

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