Good Lifestyle

Every wedding is different, but they all have one thing in common: no matter how much you love you, you are required to hit a raw hotfix earlier or later. The good news is that once you have found a way to go through the question, yourwedding will be stronger than ever. And youcanArrive on this other side. Keep reading for great advice advice on what they did to turn the heir's wedding around. And for more good advice, check what these20 people learned relationships that have failed.

Get a room of your own

"I married the strongest mammal of the universe"Megan Said of her husband, to whom she has been married for two years. Theymet on Tinder And they are happy in love, but there is a problem: he snores. "I used to think that I would eventually finish60 minutes At some point, suffocating him in his sleep, "she says. Their grace Saving Grace? A second room.

"I usually fall asleep with him, but goes up in the middle of the night and take in the other piece if he starts to snore," she says. People tend to think that having separate beds is a sign of conjugal issues. But people often like to sleep at different temperatures, and if a person is a snoring or a covered pork, she can cause serious fighting. So for some couples, separate beds are more than the sentence. Moreover, having his own bed gives Megan the extra way to be able to close with his puppy, whoA recent study found is excellent sleep help for women.

Selfish

Michael, 42 years old, says it's important for couples know it's ok to be selfish because more accomplished can do youhappier in your wedding. "You can call me a selfish husband or call my wife a selfish woman," Michael said, who has been married for 12 years. "We do not look at TV together; we look at shows on our own schedules. We do not eat a meal together; it often taught yoga in dinnertime. And we are not going in the clubs together or that we see the same Friends, "says. "We appreciate these things together when our interests overlap, but we give you the space to do it alone. So we grow together, but do not feel" stuck "together."

Love your spouse for whom they are, not who they are not

Philip Wagner-The Pastor of the Oasis Church in Los Angeles - wrote a book calledHow to turn your wedding into 10 days, in which he shares some of the secrets of his wedding of 34 years to his wife, Holly. "We had the romantic idea of ​​[marriage] and when you discover that you have real differences and that some work to do, most people think:" I may have married the bad person "or" , it should not be this hard, '"Wagnertells cbn.com. "The differences we had so fat, they almost buried us. [But] we learned to honor these differences [and] respect them and see them as forces and not as things I had to change from her or that she had to change her or that she had to change me . "Philip is a little introverted and Holly is outlining, but instead of trying to reshape the personalities from another, they started to see their opposing personalities as qualities that could make them stronger as a couple.

Philip also says many couples do not really understand what it means to "honor" someone. "It's easy to honor someone when they are new or committed, but [it's] human nature to take herself. I believe behind every wedding problem, there is a problem of Honor. Whether finances or sexuality or differences, someone feels dishonored. So, I would like to dishonor or reject things that were important for [my wife], and she would do the same with me.. .. You must be honest with yourself and you have to think: "How am I dishonored it?" And have these difficult conversations where you say, "What am I doing I do that you feel honored ? Then reinvest in that. "

Do not play the game of blame

Samantha24, was married only for a year, butPeople always say that the first year is the most difficult, especially in the current economic climate. "Being younger and always at the beginning of our career, finances are hard to navigate," she says. "Sitting, sitting, looking at what we spend and what and where we can make sacrifices, was huge. The sacrifice also means a compromise, because we both had to give things that we may not have wanted . You can not blame the other. You can not blame the other. Person for any bad expense, because the wedding is about the team and if you start "the game blame", you start not taking the responsibility and create problems and resentments. "

Choose your battles

Studies have shown thatPeople's personalities change after the first 18 months of marriageAnd not always in the best way. All these small quirks that you found so cute when you started going out with suddenly, start irritating and you find yourself without stopping. That is whyScott50 years old, believes that the thing that transformed his marriage with her husband four years around her husband, was the awareness he needed to make a real reflection to find out if a question was sufficiently important to justify a argument or if he could simply let him go.

"Choosing your battles and be willing to give in when you reach a dead end is an important skill in managing a relationship," he says. "There will be times when you will have opposite points of view on something and never succeed. Be willing to give up during some of these situations is a significant trading skill in your relationship. There will be problems that you are can absolutely give up. Keep that in mind in other situations and be prepared to compromise when it's not so important to you. "

Scott says that if something is continually harassing you, it's important to bring him instead of letting him Fester, because you can not expect someone to read your mind. But even then, you should always try to put yourself in the shoes of the other person. "One of the main reasons we are fighting is that we have our own point of view on something and see the issue through our goal," he says. "Trying to imagine what it's like on the" other side "of the argument, you can have a glimpse of your partner's feeling and how they could perceive a situation, which leads you to sometimes change position - or at least soften as a way to compromise. "

Sometimes you just need space

Amanda30 years old, almost divorced a few years ago because her in-laws led her crazy. "It took place at the point where my mother-in-law told me that I had been raised with my mother" constantly bringing men from my mother, "she says. The constant argument put a toll on his marriage because As it is often the case in these scenarios, they could not agree on how to manage the situation.

They tried family therapy, but finally, the thing that helped not talk about his in-law for a few years. "To choose not to speak for a moment did not prevent the door of their existence forever. It was just giving everyone the time to group up," she says. "Finally, everyone realized they were just raising for reasons of rage. "

Be a team

Jait, 33, says that the best advice and his wife ever had been to "remember that you are on the same team". Even do an activity together - like playing a sport or a board game where you are teammates - can help you remind you that you are on this trip called life together, step in competition.

She also says that "seeing the place where you fell in love with the restaurants of first appointment, etc. - can reduce the souvenirs of meaning you felt when you were in the honeymoon scene." It can go very far in the reigning of fire in a relationship that entered the company scene. For more things about that, find out whatScience says is in fact the happiest point of your wedding. (Spoiler alert: This is not the beginning!)

Get off your phone

One of the biggest barriers to modern relationships is the advancement of technology. ARecent study revealed that 26% of American adults Admit to be online "almost constantly".Netflix kills everyone's sex life, and"Phubbing"-The act of ignoring someone when reversing your phone - can have devastating effects on your relationship.Bella, 30, found himself in this situation when the "Phubbing" of her husband became a serious problem.

"He had a hardphone when you have just met me, so he was always present with me when we were together," she says. "But, once we got married, I would come back home and he would not even ask me how my day took place because it would be too busy scrolling through Twitter or watching videos on YouTube. And when I told him things, he would not do it. We hear me hear me because he would be buried in his phone. "For Bella, everything changed once she told her husband to How badly his behavior hurts him, and now they have a policy not to look at their phones when they spend the evening together. For more means, you could have a negative impact on your wedding, see thesethings you do not hurt who will kill your wedding.

Ditch the fantasy

Masha,I had the impression of winning the lottery when she met a handsome doctor eight years ago. But, once married, she found that her career had his descents. "He is essentially married to his work," she says. Masha decided to leave his job and create a family business with him so that they could work together. "It's not upon me to drop my dream to save a relationship. I have never sacrificed anything," she says. "I was looking for a new exciting project and just thought that his work could benefit from my skills."

As much as the combination of his career goals with his help, Masha also says that what has turned everything around the whole thing was the fact that "men are humans with feelings and background. They did not need anything and you should not establish a perfect picture relationship that you dream from puberty. Since this achievement has risen on me, our life has become so easier. "

Make a non-large gesture

In his article"How did I save my wedding" writerRichard Paul Evans Describes the few words that have changed everything for him and his wife, for the better. One day he asked his wife, Keri, a simple question, "How can I improve your day?" She became defensive and cynical. He took the matter between his hands and cleaned the garage. Then he asked the same question the next day and the day after that, and so on until she finally broke. "The walls between us dropped. We started having meaningful discussions about what we wanted to life and how we could make us mutually happier," he says.

"We have not solved all our problems. I can not even say that we never beaten again. But the nature of our fighting has changed. Not only they become more and more rare, they lacked energy they once had. We have deprive them of oxygen. We just did not have it for us to get hurt. "For more things about the amount of small important gestures,Read this viral thread in the heart of small quirks love about their loved ones.

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