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In the mid-2000s,Holly Madison andHugh Hefner's Other girlfriends at the timeBridget Marquardt andKendra Wilkinson-Shot to fame on the E! series of realityThe girls next door. The show gave the audience a glance inside the Playboy Mansion and a window in Hefner's life and girlfriends. Since his release from the mansion in 2009, Madison became more and more frank over the years to work with Playboy and Hefner's girlfriend. Recently, she recalled a moment when she felt "terrified" by looking at a picture of herself dressed in a Playboy rabbit. To see the picture and learn why he shook Madison, read on.

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This week, Madison took to Tiktok toTalking about body dysmorphia, that the Mayo clinic defines as a mental health disorder "in which you can not stop thinking about one or morefaults or defects perceived in your appearance-A flaw that seems minor or can not be seen by others. "

In the Tiktok, Madison talked about discovering an old photo of herself from 2005 dressed in Playboy Rabbit for a fashion show. She said she remembers to watch a reading of herself in the show just after and thinking: "Oh my God, I need to lose weight." "At the time, Madison said she was" terrified "on the perceived weight gain.

"[I] I thought I had won weight and I thought I did not get stuck to my diet, and I thought my thighs were huge and I thought," I have to lose five pounds at less ", she recalled.

Madison then recognized that, in the decline, his perspective was "ridiculous". She added, "I look like a stick."

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@HOLLYJEANMADISON# Green screen #Bodydysmorphia #Cleargenius #XFITYCFANTHEM♬ Original sound - Hollymadison

Madison continued to say that negative thoughts on his body have affected his daily life over the years. "I really want to worry about what I look like the way I've been a better life and to be as happy as possible and enjoy life as much as possible," A-T- She stated.

She later added that the worry of how you look is not worth the sacrifices that come there. "It's not worth feeling bad about you," she said to her spectators. "There are things we all want to improve about ourselves, but it is not even worth taking the time to be miserable."

The former Playboy Bunny said having decided to open up on his body Dysmorphia in order to help others who might have similar problems. She thought that sharing memory "could help people realize that sometimes our body dysmorphia is out of graphics."

She asked her supporters to think about their own relationships with their body and ask the question of whether your feelings on your body "hold you back to you feel bad about yourself."

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In April, MadisonOpen on another experience During his time as a Playboy rabbit. While on theCall one's dadPodcast, she said that to live in the Playboy Mansion, you had to sleep with hefner first. "No one has ever asked to move unless you slept with him," said Madison, who started getting invitations to the manor when she was 21 years old.

Madison also shared that his break with Hefner in 2008 was stimulated in part by his desire to have children. "When I realized that I would not be able to have children with him, it was a great thing ... and my depression would come back," said Madison.

In addition, she said hefner started treating her badly. "Like everyone went, I started to realize that it's just me and hef. He started to stop me anymore. I do not know if he was just stressed ... I know that the Things were not so big financially for him. He started searching for really stupid things, "she recalled." I just realized: "I can not be here." "

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