Why this case a relationship makes you always more desirable, declares psychologist
Crushing on someone? Do not lean your hand yet.
Dating councils are a penny a dozen, but it's worth much more when it's supported by science. This is why it is so exciting that social psychologists finally got to the bottom of aSecular dating question: If "playing difficult to get" really wants to go soaring or put potential partners. A new study published in theSocial and Personal Relations Journal suggests that there is a good reason toPlay it cool with your crush. By introducing aelement of uncertainty and up to your "mate value" perceived,You are more likely to be desired and continued when you play hard to get.
The team employed three different strategies to get their results. First of all, they analyzedOnline dating profiles Determine whether people were more attracted by those who were considered more difficult to obtain or attract. They discovered that people were often attracted to more "selective" profiles.
In the following two tests, the researchers coded different conversations to determine if they play hard to get a feeling of increased desire. They found that when the conversations includedDisagreement and resolution (rather than enthusiastic agreement at the front), the test topics were more invested in the other person. Because their validation has been won, they tended to value it more. These people were more likely to end the conversation byexpression of romantic interest or looking for more time together, and noted their potential partners as attractive as the control group.
"People too easy to attract can be perceived as more desperate," saidGURIT BIRNBAUM, Ph.D., social psychologist and co-author of the study. "It makes them seem less precious and attractive than those who do not do theirromantic interest apparent immediately, "she added.
But before letting your potential partner in reading, know that this method can also go wrong. "If you play hard to make you, you seem disinterested or arrogant, it will be late," warnedHarry Reis, Ph.D., co-author of the study.
So, instead ofplay related gamesOr let your meeting life grow in a series of unhealthy power players, view results as a new way to browse your relationships. Focus on building agradual connection with the other person, where there is room to grow and new things toLearn more over time. This authentic attempt to connect, associated with a feeling of anticipation and mystery, should go a long way to build both the desireand Long-term compatibility. And for more meetings, checkTwo-thirds of people say that this is a dating circuit breaker.