Good Lifestyle

Not so long ago, I became father for the first time. And since then, I became a better man. Not "a better man" in some Hokey,Jack Nicholson inAs good as possible path, but a better man, practically speaking.

In addition to all joyful and deeply personal lanes, paternity is a hell of one thing, it also granted me the benefits of the real world to start. It's like my little girl was my own personalSun tzu. Here's how you can also use the lessons of paternity to master all the rest of life. And for more good relationship tips, do not miss the30 ways to be one (a lot) best husband. (And, on that,A better wife.)

My daughter, Kate, is amazing. Have you seen his point about things? Like an Einstein, she points. She can also walk and smile. It is clearly destined for a prize ceremony in Stockholm. There is a bonding point, however: she can not speak. My daughter is 14 months old. A typical day with it is like the first half hour of2001: a spatial odyssey.

All this silent time has an adult gain: I am a more active and expressive listener. You know that personal quality, usually allocated toBill Clinton,In which someone can make you feel as if you are the only person in the room? Well, apply the rules of DAD-KID communication (empathy, laser-oriented, enthusiasm) to adults and you can make them eat your hand. Recently, I was interviewed for a new job. You would be amazed how an interview can go slowly if you just pretend that your future CEO is a 14-month-old girl. Oh, and talking about job interviews - if you have one, know it15 responses that will reserve any job interview.

When you are at work, it is not unnecessary that someone describes a ugly situation as a shit storm. Well, I'm here to tell you that the management of said storm can be much easier if you have been real. This is not a metaphor, a friend. It is a real pediformatological event. We all worked with babies, people who live on the tragedy. Faced with an obstacle, they simply lose it. This is not a reflection of the real level of peril.

Oh, did the waiter broke down? Take yourself easily, my hyperkinetic IT director. We will retrieve the server. In a few minutes, probably. There.

Since the birth of Kate, I classified all the things of life into two categories: things that can kill the baby and things that can not kill the baby. Open the jug of bleach? Category One. Boss angry? Category two. By dealing with the ultimate peril, you are much quieter and collected about all other nonsense. And if you are really super-stressed, know the20 errors that will only compose it.

My daughter, while being the sweetest future of MacArthur, you will never meet as much common sense as a bag of hammers. So, shortly after paternity coat, you start considering all angles. If you do not have a child, you do not think much about the act of opening a car trunk. When I kate in an arm while unlocking the trunk with the other, I think of what my hand should be, what foot I should put my weight. My friend without a child calls it "dad strength", something that, he says, comes to all the new fathers. That's right, but it's not a muscle. I am just more methodical and more conscious of my movements. I am like a ninja of incredibly lame things.

Something happens when you become dad: you take less shit. A ticketing agent gives you a conversation of your headquarters? Please. You made a human being! Just put the pass.

You too, you guess less. You make a decision and you do it. Not in some imprudents, Rumsfeldian Way, but when you commit yourself, you are committed. Things must be done and they must be done now. It's true about the playground and on commercial soil. The dads are the ultimate CEOs.

Treat a baby is a bit like being a member ofMariah Carey's Entourage or help withKim jong a: You are responsible for anticipating the needs of an irrational person who is completely divorced from reality. You will do anything to keep it happy and you remove the ego of the equation.

Of course, I used to be able to go to the cinema whenever I wanted, but after a certain point, you have to ask yourself, is all this median going to make me a better person? Doubtful. For this, you need someone to put you in your place. Zen Buddhism has this concept of MU, or "empty" that often manifests itself in the context of "non-me" or "no ego". I do not know much about Zen Buddhism, but I know it that: the one who came with Mu, had clearly stretched peas in his face at some point.

Note: This story has originally run in the November 2008 issue of Better life.

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