Good Lifestyle

In our society, men are raised to believe that they can not cry or show emotions and have to upset their feelings so as not to look weak. But a growing body of research shows thatThis "difficult" attitude is harmful to the emotional, mental and sexual well-being of a man, not to mention harmful to his relationships with friends, family members and romantic partners.

That's why many men, likeDwayne The Rock Johnson andRyan Reynoldsare celebrated forgo out and say that it is healthy to be sad, andGive tips on how to deal with dark thoughts.

Despite his charming external and savage career successful, more recently as one of the science fiction stars hit by HBOWestworld,James Marsden, 44, had its fair share of troubling time. His parents divorced when he was 9 years old, then he and his brothers and sisters grew up with his mother in Oklahoma, seeing only their father in part. Then, in 2011, his wife,Mary Elizabeth "Lisa" Linde, left him after 11 years of marriage.

Today, the star is fine, but he learned a lot about his experiences on how to deal with emotions and he shared these ideas (and more!)In an extremely revealing profile for the cover of the June issue ofThe health of men. And strengthen your own department of feelings, learn the20 ways to increase your emotional intelligence.

On the treatment of his parents' divorce, Marsden said the following: "I guess I was good to compartmentalize when I was young when I was young. Whatever the life that deceived me, I I went treated. Then you realize when you are older than it was a kind of defense mechanism. I was a child trying not to be afraid of something and managing it in a way, maybe not The best way, but the only way I was capable of this age. "For what it goes,Recent studies have shown that having a support groupEven a virtual group of foreigners like those you find on Reddit, can really help fight against depression.

Everyone wants to be great for what they do, and even those who succeed have imposition syndrome, and Marsden is no different. "You want to be great," he says. "You want to affect people, but I do not always fit work thought, 'Wow, I really nailed this scene today .... I'm going home thinking:' Ah, I'm a fraud ? " Because it can be hard on itself, Marsden had to cut negativity. "I have to train to stop being cerebral about it. Stop exceeding."

"People who are like" Oh, it was great. I am the best ", are usually those who are not. Unless you are Kanye West. I would like to be so confident of myself. I wish might think like him, telling me that I am great all day. I have not been raised in this way, nor to think or talk about this way. But it's impressive. "GivenThe recent fury on Kanye West's tweettstormsMost people no longer want to be Kanye West anyway.

Like the rock, Marsen Canonne his feelings in his training routine and he calls for the exercise of the cheapest antidepressant. "Indeed, a growing amount of researchsays that the perspiration of our stress or sadness is a great way without drugs to manage depression. And if there is one thing we learned fromThis man who dropped from 70 pounds of weight and sadnessIt is because exercise can help you lose emotions as well as weight.

It's been 7 years old, but Marsden still feels the pain of his wife's split, that he called "by far the most difficult thing. I love it ... I thought, "Oh my God, I repeat what my parents do? ' You know, you do not want to feel like a failure. " AsChris Pratt,who recently opened his heartbreaking separation ofAnna Faris, would say that the whole process is zero. It's awful, but it's also an opportunity for reflection and personal growth.

"It's sad and heartbreaking," said Marsen. "I separated not only from my wife but also my children and the links of the house and the family. These are things you are painfully recalled every day." Unlike previously, however, it has dealt with these emotions. She made all the difference. "This time, I have passed it and I have not avoided it, like the divorce of my parents, and it is vital too."

"A lot ... went well for me all my life and I came easy for me. Being a white man, you were born with certain non-earnings privileges. My life has not been filled with sorrow and difficulty. When the divorce happened, was the first time I felt that I lost my balance. It was scary and sad and made me put everything in place. I had to focus on what was important . That's what I'm now because of that. I know that regrets can be catalysts for good things. Do not talk like a pointing card, but it's true. "

Today, Marsden has a great relationship with his ex-wife and children, Jack, 17 and Mary James, 12, who came out of their marriage.A little likeGwyneth Paltrow and his ex,Chris MartinHe even continues on vacation with them and his current girlfriend, aged 29 UK Pop Singer Edi (AKA.Emma Deigman) And their five-year-old child, William Luca Costa-Marsden. People change today's concept of modern family and,likeChanning Tatum andJenna Dewan would say it's "all love".

"I'm lucky," said Marsden of his current family situation. "Someone outdoors is like what this strange is a bizarre municipality, Hippie-Dippy? [But] When you have people who care about these children and you care about these children and you just want to give love, how can you not welcome them? "

One of the great mentors of Marsden's life was his deceased grandfather, who took her to fishing when he was a boy and helped him through the split of his parents. "He ruined my grandmother. He has taken care of her for 20 years because she was sick and again. He would wait for his hand and foot until his last days and safer his chocolates at the hospital. It was likeNotebook.It taught me a lot about love....He told me, 'Do the right thing, even when no one looks. You know, it's like the character's testimony. He taught me to do good things and be a good person. You know, wanting to be a person of substance and have a real character, especially for my own children. "

"At some point, you have to free them in nature," he said, "and at this point, just think:" Jesus, I hope I did. "But of all my achievements in life, being a father is the only thing I'm most proud of. It's the most fulisful. I'm still self-deprecian, but I have no problem saying that I Am a grandfather. "

A lot of being a grandfather, for Marsden, was the ability to show them that it's ok to fail; That's what you do with the failure that counts. "You have to see the hero spoil or fail something to become a man" is that for me, has become more important than being this superstar, a movie star or an actor. This is the integrity and substance of the character - it's like when [bad things] happens to you in difficult times, what happens because of that? Your kids look at you and that's how they define who and what they are supposed to be. "

This is definitely on our list of20 ways of being one (a lot) best father.

"I am very proud and very lucky to do what I do. I want to move people. I like when people prevent me from saying that they love my job or thought I was funny, or that I They made them cry. It's always important for me. But if I could not do that, my happiness is to know that I am a fully realized person and my happiness does not depend on being a success within Hollywood. I want to be able to take buttons and be filled. There is so much more to life as giving love and being decent. I want to lead with my heart. "

Everything comes back to that.During several points of the interview , Marsden lengthened with tears and it's a good thing. "When you try to block or circulate or avoid problems," he said, "It's when you do not live life. I was wounded, I was wounded. I had fun. Learn from this. "

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