Marriage experts explain why women initiate divorce more than men
The experts cite the reasons why women initiate divorce, which reflect a big change in how women also consider marriage.
Traditional gender stereotypes would like to make you believe that women are those who are more eager tosettle down and get married. But according to the data, there is another surprising element of the marriage that women are more likely to initiate also: the divorce. Yes, study after study demonstrated thatwomen much more ask for divorce than men these days. According to 2015 research of theAmerican Sociological Association (ASA), women impulses nearly 70 percent of divorces.
The idea that women are the first to installand The first to separate may seem confusing for many. So we talked to aconjugal therapistA clinical psychologist and adivorce mediator To find out why women more often ask for the divorce than men and what says about sexual roles in today's day and age. What we found is that all this comes down to three main factors.
Women are more likely to feel like marriage holds them back.
Today, women work more than they have ever been. In fact, December 2019 data from theAmerican Office of Labor Statistics revealed that women today represent a little more than half of the labor force. But that does not mean that their domestic tasks have decreased. "I think marriage as an institution was a little slow to catch up with expectations for gender equality,"Michael Rosenfeld, Associate Professor of Sociology at Stanford University who wrote the ASA study, said in adeclaration. "Women still take the names of their husbands, and are sometimes forced to do it. The husbands are still waiting for their wives to do most of the housework and most of the childcare. »
Research has constantly shown thatWomen do even more housework than menEven if both parties have full-time jobs. For example, a 2019 report by theAmerican Office of Labor Statistics Revealed that 49 percent of women has been cleaning on a daily basis, compared to only 20 percent of men, even if they were both employees. This indicates that there is still a lack of equality with respect to domestic work within the average American household, and there is a gap that could make the marriage seems less advantageous for a woman who is focused on the career.
"If the woman makes more money, but should still do more household chores and child care, what is the point? " demandAnita A. Chlipala, A licensed marriage and family therapist and author ofFirst comes us: guide of the couple occupied with lasting love.
In addition to this, some women are in the difficult situation not to be taken care of by their husbands when they find success in the workplace. A 2019 study of more than 6,000 American heterosexual couples published in the journalPersonality Bulletin and Social Psychology even found that many experienced men "psychological distress" if theirwomen started making more money that all along their marriage.
If a woman feels like her husband is threatened by her success or holds her return from professional advancement,andThe pressure of taking most of the domestic responsibilities and the education of children in addition to that, she may want to leave her marriage.
Women tend to do more emotional work in a marriage.
One of the biggest married couple problems is a faceLack of health communication, And often it follows from imbalance another one. Traditionally, men are not taught how to treat orcommunicate their emotions, And that means women tend to take on emotional work of marriage, too.
"Many men rely on their wives as a sole emotional support provider, while women receive emotional support from a variety of locations. This could make men more reluctant to leave their sole source of support, "saysTricia Wolanin, A clinical psychologist atUnfold your blouse. "Women are more open to treating their emotions with friends, while men seem to feel fully difficultOpen with other peers About their struggles, and are therefore more likely to follow the fair status quo ".
Women are less likely to tolerate "bad behavior" today.
Not too long, women feel like there were some questions they were just going to have to turn a blind eye in exchange for financial security. Now? Not really.
"Modern woman today is more unlikely toset up with infidelity, "saysDori Schwartz, A divorce mediator and coachDIVORCEHARMONY.COM. "Once thehoneymoon is over, Some men radically change their romantic behaviorControl and emotionally violent. Unfortunately, this happens in many weddings, and women do not want to take more ".
If you think this gender imbalance applies only to heterosexual relationships, think again. The same sex marriage was only legal in the U.K. Since 2014, but a 2017 report of the country National Statistics Office found that 78% of the same-sex marriages ending in the divorce were between two women, indicating that today's women could have higher expectations for marriage than men in general.
Rosenfeld agrees that the mere truth could be that women feel like they do not understand what they have been promised in their wishes to their marriage. "Waiting is that marriage has a lot of benefits and positive features for women he did not have in the past," he said The Washington Post In 2015. "But the truth is much more delicate than that."