If you and your partner, you can agree, it's time to break

Do not see the eyes on this one thing makes ruin your relationship.


If it looks like yourThe relationship has been under extra stress Recently, it is not surprising - after all, a global pandemic is hardly sailing gently in any major area of ​​your life. Stress levels are at high records, your usual support systems are evaporated and of courseis Such a thing too much time together. But an authorized clinical psychologist and an author of best livelyAndrea Bonior, PhD, recently explained toPsychology today that even if you query your torque, especially in the middle of the pandemic, "all is not lost." However, there is a handful of signs that the relationship is "after the point of no return". In particular, bonior says thatYou may be directed towards a break If you and your partner, you can agree on one thing: specifically, what are the problems in the relationship. Read it to find out if your own relationship is on the rocks, and for more relationship tips, checkThe word you say who ruins your relationship, say experts.

Bonior explains that he does not agree on what your relationship problems canSend your spiral romance Because if you can not even decide what problems you have to address, it is very difficult to progress towards a healthier place. "It's particularly difficult to start working on a problem when there is a total disagreement as to what this problem is," says Bonueior, adding that you blame each other for your relationship problems can lead to the collapse ultimate of your relationship. "If each of you blames the other as being the true origin of what is happening badly, it will be difficult to find common ground or to be ready to be sufficiently vulnerable for real change."

In addition, if a partner is inclined to place blame, he can discourage others from raising concerns in the first place of fear of being returned, attacked or misunderstood. Without name your problems and open on theareas of the relationship that requires work, you are less likely to find effective solutions.

Nancy collar, LCSW, saysPsychology today That the best approach is to let go of the idea of ​​assigning to one or the other of the parts as much as possible. Ask yourself if yourpulse to blame Is it usual, responsive or selfish, rather than necessary to move forward - where appropriate, it is important to recognize that this reaction can interfere with your communication and your erect confidence. In the end, they are feelings that frequently lead to relationships ending.

The good news? Bonior says that even if younot See now your eyes on theRelationship problemsYou may be able to recover things with some efforts. "It's not insurmountable, because professional help can usually give an overview of the roots of problems," she writes. Try to share and receive concerns with an open heart, do not perceive them as critic, but as a starting point for mutual growth. And, in case of doubt, I hope you can all accept that: if one of you believes that one of you considers it as "a problem", it deserves the time and the attention of both parties. Wondering what other signs can signal a coming break? Read on red flags more serious or if you are looking for a partner,This trait makes people want a serious relationship with you, the study says.

1
You use the call-call.

Young man turning back to his arguing girlfriend. Foreground focus on the male.
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Healthy relationships Are constructed on mutual respect, so the use of call-call during an argument can seriously damage the dynamics. "Once the noming call name flood opens, it is difficult to stop the flow," saysAmanda Lopez, a licenseWedding and family therapist Based in Vista, California. "That's where it takes a lot of inner self-control to focus on what makes your partner special and what they do well. If we can change our thoughts, we have a better control of what comes out of our Mouth, "she adds. And for more relationship tips delivered directly into your inbox,Sign up for our daily newsletter.

2
You feel alone when you are together.

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If you notice that you feel alone by spending time with your spouse, this could be a sign that you and your partner separate you. In the middle of the pandemic, who pushed together coexist to spend much more time together, but diminished the opportunities ofquality Time, it probably affects more couples.

Wedding and family therapist based on CaliforniaDevorah Rogers suggests that when couples find themselves in this situation, they should focus onincrease their communication.It is equally important, she says, learns to discuss these feelings with an equilibrium of honesty and tact. Because it's a deeply emotional subject and a difficult thing to hear, Rogers recommends that you "use statements" i 'and avoid blaming. "Be clear that your ultimate goal is not to be fingered, but returning to a better privacy and a better connection. And for more sage love tips, check the33 The most common reasons why relationships fail.

3
You do not make an effort to spend quality time together.

bored couple lying in bed with smartphones, things you should never say to your spouse
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You may bespend more time together than ever During the pandemic, but expensesquality Time is something else.

"Think about your relationship like a cup, "saysKathryn Moore, PhD, a psychologist at the Child Development Center and the Saint John Providence Family in Santa Monica, California. "The cut is filled by the connection, attentive actions, support, emotional and physical intimacy and positive moments together. This cup is emptied by negative interactions, stress and feelings of isolation and [being] undesirable [being] . Quality time together is the trick This fills the cutting of the relationship and provides fuel to cross difficult or stressful moments. "

This is undoubtedly a challenge in the middle of the pandemic, but the quality can be as simple as a night of cavidous security, a thoughtful gesture, or even a conversation.

4
You have stopped sharing things that count for you.

young black couple sitting next to each other at a coffee shop and not speaking or making eye contact
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Ultimately,collaborative communication and reciprocity areEssential ingredients of a flourishing relationship, saysMayra Mendez, PhD, LMFT, a coordinator of the authorized psychotherapist and the program at the Child Development Center and the Saint John Providence Family of California.

That's why it's so important to "make an effort to share thoughts daily, ideas and experiences," she says. Do not make a sincere effort to "show interest when your partner shared their day and follow up with the sharing of your day" can have a degrading effect on the relationship with time. And if you find it difficult to keep things fresh in the middle of the pandemic, check these17 quarantine marriage tips for relational experts.


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