Good Lifestyle

It's a sad truth that not every couple who walks down the aisle will find the happiness they are after. On the contrary, in 2020, a year when 1,676,911 marriages were reported to the U.S Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), 630,505 divorces and annulments were also announced. However, that's not to say the majority of marriages are doomed. With proper communication, effort, and appreciation, a relationship can flourish and become one of the most rewarding aspects of one's life.

But when it comes to how we give and receive love, there are a few people who should be extra cautious with their marriage and its potential for collapse. Your love language can say a lot about you—even whether or not your union will last. Read on to discover the love language that relationship experts say means you're more likely to divorce.

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To start, what are the five love languages? "The love languages are a concept developed by author and pastor Gary Chapman to describe different ways that people express love and like to have love expressed to them," says Suzannah Weiss, a sex and love coach and certified sex educator. "They are gifts, quality time, acts of service, words of affirmation, and physical touch." To learn your love language, you can simply take an online quiz.

Once you know your love language and your partner's love language, you can use that information to discover the ways you can make each other happiest. "For instance, if your love language is gifts, you might assume the sweetest way to help your partner recover from a bad day is to get them a gift," says Weiss. "But if their love language is physical touch, they may actually prefer a cuddle session or a massage." While these preferences may vary from day to day, knowing their love language could help guide your general approach.

Unfortunately, there could be one love language that could signal splitsville more often than the others. Ayon kayRori Sassoon,relationship expert and co-owner of matchmaking agency Platinum Poire, that love language is gifts. "A person whose preferred love language is gift-giving will have the most difficult time connecting with the remaining four love languages," says Sassoon. "Whether it's time, touch, service, or words, a gift lover may not see the value in precious moments over presents." This could lead to fights and incompatibility if the other partner doesn't understand the gift giver's approach.ae0fcc31ae342fd3a1346ebb1f342fcb

Things could go especially south if there is a change of fortune in a relationship with a person whose love language is gifts. "Say their partner went through a rough patch, financially speaking," says Sassoon. "If they could no longer provide 'love' through gifts, is the relationship at risk of crumbling? When the foundation of love involves a present over a person, the relationship is fragile to begin with."

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Other love languages could also be at risk for marital strife. "The most difficult match of love languages in my experience is when one person needs words of affirmation and the other person is not good at expressing love in words and has acts of service as their number one language," saysAmy Armstrong, licensed independent social worker and co-founder of The Center for Family Resolution.

Keresse Thompson,licensed clinical social worker and host of the podcast Diary of An Empath, agrees these two love languages can occasionally clash. "The words of affirmation partner just needs to hear validation," says Thompson. "Whereas the partner of acts of service just wants their partner to go out of their way or do things that make their life easier." Sa kabutihang-palad,healthy communication can fix this issue and allow both members of the couple to feel seen, heard, and appreciated.

Ang pinakamagandang bagay tungkol sa paglubog ng iyong sarili sa kaalaman ng limang wika ng pag -ibig ay maaari mong gamitin ito upang mapagbuti ang iyong kasal - kahit na sa palagay mo ay medyo nasa mga bato. Ang pinakamadaling paraan upang magsimula ay sa pamamagitan ng pagtukoy sa iyo at ng wika ng pag -ibig ng iyong kapareha. Pagkatapos, alamin ang lahat ng iyong makakaya tungkol sa bawat isa sa mga wika ng pag -ibig. "Maglaan ng oras, nag -iisa, o magkasama upang gumawa ng ilang pananaliksik at alamin ang tungkol sa pag -ibig ng wika ng iyong kapareha," sabiSophie Mona Pagès, queer, dalubhasa sa relasyon ng bipoc at tagapagtatag at CEO ngMga relasyon sa app Apoy sa kampo. "Mahalaga rin na malaman at makakuha ng isang mas mahusay na pananaw sa iyong sariling wika ng pag -ibig upang maipaliwanag ito nang mas mahusay."

Pagkatapos, magsama -sama at makipag -usap. "Mahalagang umupo kasama ang iyong kapareha, talakayin ang iyong mga natuklasan, at tanungin ang mahalagang katanungan: Paano mo nais kong sabihin ang iyong wika ng pag -ibig?" sabi ni Pagès. "Ang mga kategoryang ito ay mga alituntunin lamang; ang mga wika ng pag -ibig ay naiiba sa iba't ibang mga tao, at kailangan mong maunawaan ang mga indibidwal na karanasan at pangangailangan ng iyong mga mahal sa buhay." Tala ng Pagès mahalaga na maging mahina at matapat sa hakbang na ito.

Sa wakas, gumawa ng aksyon at magpatuloy upang talakayin ang iyong mga wika ng pag -ibig at kung paano ka makakabutiipakita ang pagmamahal sa bawat isa. "Ang mga relasyon ay palaging isang gawain sa pag-unlad at ang mga check-in ay kinakailangan sa daan," sabi ni Pagè. "Bawat isang beses, mag -iskedyul ng ilang oras sa iyong kapareha upang umupo at talakayin kung paano ka nagagawa hanggang sa pagsasalita ng mga wika ng bawat isa at kung ano ang maaari mong gawin mas mahusay na pasulong." Mula doon, magiging maayos ka sa iyong paraan upang makarating sa parehong pahina at gawing mas pinahahalagahan ang bawat isa kaysa dati.

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