Good Lifestyle

One of the most anticipated moments for those who work a lot, inside or outside the home: bedtime. You brush your teeth, put on your pajamas, lie in bed and close your eyes with a smile. But, minutes later, your partner's fussing begins. Snoring, insomnia, tossing and turning, and you can't sleep, you get irritated and the two end up fighting.

Or it's the other way around, and you're the one being nudged in the middle of the night to stop snoring and tossing and turning in bed. As incredible as it may seem, this is the routine of many couples. This is even the reason for many people's separation, which could be avoided with a simple habit that is being increasingly adopted: “sleep divorce”.

What is sleep divorce?

According to the American Academy of Sleep Medicine (AASM), more than a third of US couples sleep in separate beds and/or rooms to improve their sleep.

Every now and then or every night, nearly half of American men (45%) and a quarter of American women (25%) like to lie down on the couch or in a guest room at night, a practice known as “sleep divorce.”

According to Dr. Seema Khosla, pulmonologist and spokesperson for AASM, "poor sleep can worsen mood, and sleep-deprived people are more likely to argue with their partner. There may be resentment toward the person causing the sleep disruption, which can negatively affect the relationship."

According to her, a good night's sleep helps both health and individual and joint happiness. “It’s no surprise that some couples choose to sleep separately for their overall well-being,” he adds.

Physical health, as well as emotional

Yes, sleep divorce seems to be serious and even worrying for some relationships, but it just means that the couple prioritizes each other's well-being at night. Sleeping in separate rooms or beds can improve the mood of both parties, and studies have shown that couples who consistently have poor sleep are more likely to fight.

But physical health also matters. A good night's sleep helps prevent car accidents, heart problems and a reduction in the body's immunity capacity. Furthermore, some people who move a lot during the night may engage in behaviors that simulate dreams, such as kicking and hitting, which could inadvertently injure the other person.

If the problem (yours or your partner's) is snoring, it may not be enough to have separate bedrooms. In fact, snoring itself may already be indicating a health issue that deserves attention, especially if it is accompanied by choking or interrupted breathing during sleep.

This condition, called sleep apnea, can greatly affect an individual's life, as it can cause daytime drowsiness, memory loss, low libido, headaches and difficulty concentrating.

Alternatives to Sleep Divorce

If you are one of those people who don't want to sacrifice cuddling every night or don't want to be so radical as to divorce sleep, you can:

• Make adjustments to your sleep routine to adapt to your partner's routine.
• Consult an otolaryngology professional to investigate the possibility of sleep apnea.
• Use earplugs.
• Have separate bed linen (duvet, sheets and covers).

These options can help you, especially if you don't like sleeping separately or if you haven't adapted well to it. In some cases, sleep divorce can even disrupt the couple's sleep, mainly due to the lack of someone by their side and the feeling of insecurity that sleeping alone can bring.