Good Lifestyle

Couple discussions are practically inevitable, because it is normal for some point - or in several - of the relationship - differences are presented. The problem can arise when these debates become stories and become stormy fights that can leave incurable injuries. In the midst of a dispute in which both parties believe they are right, there is something that helps us realize that we are on the limit: our body. If we learn to listen to it, we can have a little more control over our answers and seek to calm down to find a solution. We bring you seven signals to which you have to pay attention to help you when you need it.

Accelerated cardiac pulse

Emotions such as anger, fear and anxiety that may be present in a fight, trigger an answer that makes the body enter alert, what some experts call "fight or flee", or survival. This occurs because your brain records the discussion as a threat, ordering the adrenal glands to release adrenaline and cortisol, stress hormones. Thus, your heart rate, blood pressure and breathing increase. If during the fight you feel that instead of talking you just had a kilometer, this is a sign that you need to stop, breathe and return to a state of calm before everything escapes from your control.

Red cheeks and sweating

Another effect of cortisol and adrenaline running through your body while discussing with your half orange is the increase in your body temperature, which can make you begin to perspire as if you did sports. Since the blood flow is also affected, you are likely to feel that you blush or that your face gets hot, or even feel cold and sticky hands through sweat. This is the form of the body of self -regulating and managing stress, making your sweat glands "refresh." Look like an internal thermostat that warns you that things are warming beyond what can be comfortable or healthy. Sit, breathe and (if possible) allow yourself for a few minutes to calm down.

Affected memory

This is one of the signals that could bring more problems in the midst of a discussion. In some cases, stressful experiences can make memory altered. This can translate that your memories can be very clear or vivid (which can actually help find a solution) or that, on the contrary, they are completely distorted or erased. When the latter occurs, you can find yourself arguing for things that did not happen as you think they happened, which generates even more tension with your partner. If you feel that your memory is failing you because of anger and you are ignoring important details, it is best to take time alone to order your thoughts and have the clear facts.

Trembling voice, acute or tone rise

Starting to raise your voice or shout without realizing it is one of the clearest signals that the discussion is becoming unsustainable. This is a natural response to strong emotions: your vocal cords and diaphragm are being affected by tension in the body. This is also seen in a more acute tone of voice than normal or in a more trembling voice, affecting your speech. When you listen to yourself talking like this, you know you have to look for calm. The screams are not a good form of communication and many times the only thing they do, in addition to making your throat hurt later, is to generate a similar response from your partner, and thus it is very difficult to reach agreements assertively.

Stomach sensitivity

If you are one of the people who suffer from stomach sensitivity, you will also have noticed that those butterflies you feel when you are with your partner seem to become a swarm of wasps when the discussion becomes high. It is shown that there is a connection between the brain and the intestine that makes emotions affect the viscera by staying with little blood flow. Remember, when you are in that state of alarm that we explain in the first point, your whole blood goes to the brain and muscles to prepare for the fight, which makes your stomach stay, let's say, "empty." This causes well -known spasms or turnings. There are those who even suffer nausea or even diarrhea. If you feel like this when you fight, it is a sign that your stress is in the clouds.

Unexpected reactions

When the level of anger, stress or anxiety is too high to handle it, your emotions are likely overflowing in an unexpected way. Have you heard anecdotes of people who do not stop laughing at funerals? This is the reason, and it may happen that in the midst of your fight with your amorcito stals in laughter at the worst moment. Or, at the other extreme, that you begin to cry uncontrollably. Both reactions are natural. Laughter is a form that the brain has to release stress and crying is a mechanism for defense of the body to negative emotions. If something like that happens to you, it means that you have reached an extreme point and you must look for calm.

Body tension

Perhaps the most common signal that your anger is found to the limit is: fists and tense necks, tight jaw, shoulders up ... If you feel that your body is about to petrify, you are on the edge of your nerves. It is a natural reaction because your brain associates discussions with physical confrontation, so it seeks to prepare becoming an “armor” so that it does not damage your organs. If you do not counteract it quickly, it is likely that you later feel the sequelae (muscle or headaches) until several days later. For conversation, breathe, stretch or give a small walk to be you again.