I am a dating coach and these are the 3 questions you need to ask during a first date

These subjects help you know someone at a deeper level.


Where did you grow up? What do you do for work? What are your hobbies? These are all the basic questions that are generally covered on a date, but they do not necessarily help you Get to know the person at a deeper level. According to dating coach Sabrina Zohar , there are three specific questions that you should ask during a first date to "assess the emotional availability and the depth of someone". Read the rest to hear your advice, so you can determine if you want to opt for date number two.

In relation: How long do you have to wait to send an SMS after a first appointment? Experts weigh . AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB

1
How did your last relationship end?

first date questions, essential dating tips for men over 40
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Zohar, who shares his dating advice on Tiktok, says the First important question Ask how their last relationship ended and what she taught them about themselves.

She specifies that this question does not concern the ex of the person, but rather to determine the aspects which led to the end of the relationship. Other things to think are whether they have taken possession or responsibility for their actions or if they blame their ex for everything that has gone wrong.

In relation: 5 Dating red flags that you should never ignore, warn the experts .

2
What are your intentions with meetings?

A man sitting at an outdoor restaurant table shakes hands with a woman who he's meeting for a first date.
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The second question could be asked in two ways: what are your intentions with meetings? Or, how do you see a partner integrate into your life?

"To a certain extent, in a way, it is important to ask someone what they really seek or what he has the bandwidth," said Zohar. It is essential to establish this in advance, you can therefore see if their behaviors and their words align in the long term.

"Someone might say that he wants a relationship - they could really want one - that doesn't mean he wants one with you or wants one with you as you want one," she explains .

In relation: Never wear this clothing to a first appointment, say the experts .

3
What are you working with something that you are passionate about?

Cheerful mature lady is communicating with husband while relaxing with mugs of tea in green countryside
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"The reason why I like this question is because it can give you an overview if this person even has the bandwidth, time or energy to be in a relationship," explains Zohar.

She gives the example of an appointment she lasted when the person worked on a feature film and traveled for months. By asking the question, they could agree that the timing was not correct.

"Sometimes people really have the best intentions when they go out and go out, but after they meet you and reality settles down, things happen," she explains. "It is therefore important to start keeping the dialogue open."

In relation: The first things that someone notices about you on a date, according to experts .

There are other things to know.

Man looking skeptically at woman
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In addition to the way a date answers questions, there are also a few things that they could say that could potentially be red flags, shares Zohar Another video .

The first is: "I'm not looking for anything serious." According to Zohar, it is not "an invitation to prove yourself". They obviously tell you that they do not want a relationship, and the chances are good that you were injured.

Another thing to watch is if they say, "You are just too good for me." Zohar notes that everyone wants the best version of a partner, but this attitude is like "identifying a price", and either they will want to hang on for expensive life, or they will decide that you are no longer a "price" And go away.

And thirdly, when someone claims that all their exs are "crazy" without taking responsibility, you should be wary. Most of the time, their exs were "crazy" because of something that their partner caused, explains Zohar.

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