There are four types of guilt - and they can all affect your relationship, says a new study
But two types of interpersonal guilt are the most harmful, according to the results.
Guilt is one of the Ickales most emotions imaginable. This can make us feel bad in our position in life and often pushes us to do things that we would not generally do it (for example, how many times have you been guilty of organizing a vacation dinner when you prefer go to a restaurant). Unsurprisingly, guilt can also have an impact on our romantic relationships. A recent study of University of Rome There are four types of interpersonal guilt - and everyone affects our behaviors differently. Read the rest to learn the implications for you and your love life.
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These are the four types of guilt.
Researchers from the University of Rome wanted to find a link between the types of interpersonal guilt and their relationship with attachment and altruism. They interviewed 393 adults (who were on average 34 years old and identified as women in 70% of cases) about their feelings of guilt and classified these feelings in four buckets. According to Susan Krauss Whitbourne , PHD, professor emeritus of psychological and cerebral sciences at the University of Massachusetts Amherst, in Psychology today , these buckets are:
- Survivor Guilt: I feel uncomfortable to feel better than the others.
- Guaping separation: I think I shouldn't separate dear beings because it would be hurtful, unfair, or make them feel abandoned.
- Guaping of omnipotent liability: I think it is my responsibility to solve the problems of others.
- Self -hatred: I don't deserve to be happy.
Different types of guilt lead to different behaviors.
The study revealed that the guilt of omnipotent liability was the only form of guilt correlated with altruism; This type of guilt was also associated with anxious attachment.
Those who have the guilt of self -hatred have shown the highest cases of personality pathology.
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So what happens if you have the guilt of omnipotent responsibility?
These results have real implications for romantic relationships. David Tzall , Psyd, a approved psychologist Based in Brooklyn, notes that the guilt of omnipotent liability can create tensions in several ways.
"This can exert a lot of pressure on the person who undergoes guilt to constantly do more and more for his beloved, which can be exhausting and lead to professional exhaustion," he said. This can lead the person to avoid setting limits with their partner, which leads to resentment.
"It is important that the two partners of a relationship can take care of their own needs and have a healthy balance of giving and taking," adds Tzall. "The guilt of omnipotent liability can disrupt this balance and cause problems in the relationship."
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Or the guilt of self -hatred?
The guilt of self -hatred can also have an impact on relationships. Tzall explains that those who live this form of guilt may have trouble believing that they are worthy of love.
"They can have low self -esteem and fight with feelings of insufficiency," said Tzall. "They can also be self -criticism and display difficulties in accepting compliments or positive comments from their partner." Over time, these behaviors can impress the relationship.
Fortunately, there are ways to improve. "It is important for a person with self -hatred of working to improve their self -esteem and self -esteem in order to have a healthy and fulfilling relationship," said Tzall. "This can involve the search for therapy or other forms of support." By treating untreated trauma, a person can enter a mature relationship that has no aspect of care.
"It may be useful to remember your positive qualities and focus on the things you have made and the progress you have made," said Tzall. AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB
The guilt of survivors and the guilt of separation are also problematic.
The guilt of the survivor is often identified with those who suffer from SSPT, say a soldier who was the only one in their group to survive an attack. But according to Mind very well , it can also apply to those who have experienced car accidents, natural disasters or medical trauma. And like Psychology today Explain that this type of guilt can lead to irritability, feelings of helplessness and disconnection, and a lack of motivation - which can all be played in relationships.
The guilt of separation can prevent someone from leaving an unhappy or unhealthy relationship due to fear about how the other The person will face.
Psychology today Note that, according to the authors of the study, the four types of guilt are rooted "in" in " Early childhood experiences with caregivers. "Those who have seen a parent or a parental figure do everything for their partner are more likely to imitate behavior and" assume that they are responsible for all their actions who reflect negatively on someone who is close to his heart ".