Good Lifestyle

We all know that perfect relationships do not exist (no, not even Barack and Michelle) and it's natural to have moments when you and your partner are not on the same page . These ups and downs are normal, but do you aggravate them without even realizing it? Not all relationships end with large eruptions and fights, this can happen gradually as things accumulate over time. Read the rest to learn the little things that therapists say could ruin your relationship if they continue to go unnoticed.

Read this then: 5 signs of body language which means that your partner wants to break, according to the therapists .

Do not verbally tell your partner your expectations in the relationship, No matter how much , maybe a disaster recipe. You cannot expect someone to read your mind at the start of a relationship, or when you have been together for some time and want it to bring a change.

Tracy Vadakumchery , LMHC at Thebadiftiantherapist , recount Better life Whether an infallible way to ruin a relationship is while waiting for you to communicate. It can be anything, "I'm not looking for anything serious right now", "I need space", for "I have the impression that you have not made me a priority ".

"It is important to be precise," she said. "What do you mean by" serious "," space ", or" priority "? What is it like for you? These words mean different things for many people."

Talking openly with your partner about your two expectations will help create a mutual understanding and will also establish healthy limits.

The search for perfection in a relationship is not only deeply unrealistic, it is also incredibly unhealthy. No one is perfect, so spending your time expecting (or looking for) something that does not exist, could be constantly frustrated and your partner feeling insignificant.

"There is this idea that our partner should never disappoint us," says Vadakumchery. "In any relationship, there will always be a time when we will manage. We are necessarily disappointed and let us disappoint the people who interest us. Your partner is not perfect, but they should meet you where you are, recognize When they have spoiled and are intentional about their expectations and also meet yours. "

Instead of trying to find the perfect partner, it is useful to focus on Someone's unique qualities That makes them who they are. AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB

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Resentment can develop as mold in a relationship - and keeping these frustrations can often make a snowball in something much greater.

"Each partner will be irritated and bored by the points of the relationship," said Lori Kret , LCSW, BCC and co-founder of Aspen Relationship Institute . "But allowing this friction to develop in resentments over time, it is also the connection to Erode. If your partner continues to act in a way that creates resentment, take a step back and assess if it is is really a big problem or if you are just nitpicking. "

Holding on bitterness and irritation will only lead to fighting and negativity - and sometimes it may not even be directly linked to what your significant other does.

"If you feel irritated in general or on other aspects of your life, you can wrongly perfect your partner as a source," explains Kret. "If this is the case, take the time to adjust your point of view and work to release these feelings of resentment."

Kristal Desantis , LMFT, specializing in trauma, sexual therapy and relationships, says Better life That couples can ruin their relationship by avoiding difficult conversations. Do not talk about your past or something you may be ashamed or know that you could upset your partner, can make the problem be understood and perhaps become a big resentment later.

When you avoid a hard conversation, that does not make the problem disappear, it simply kicked the box, "she said." To solve something before it becomes a more important problem. ""

Read this then: 5 red flag relations that you should never ignore, warn the therapists .

Speaking from time to quality with each other is an essential element to have a positive and love relationship. This could mean doing a long walk together or having a standing appointment, but should never be confused with being at home at the same time or even sit on the sofa from each other in front of the TV .

"Being in the same physical space is not the same as connection," explains Kret. "Couples, in particular those who live together, often become complacent to create significant moments together. Seeing yourself every day becomes monotonous and there can be a desire to disconnect more, either by being sucked on a screen or in moving away from the plans. "

You and your partner should not feel like roommates - maybe it's time to take out a puzzle or a bottle of wine? It can be fun and even do you fall a little more in love.