5 things you should never say about the text, according to the therapists

Make sure you think twice before pressing this shipment button.


Many of us prefer to use texts like ourmain communication Due to speed and ease. But you may want to think twice before pressing this send button. Although there are many positive factors to send SMS,Sarah Swenson, LMHVC, an approved therapist who works with couples around the world, also saysBetter life that most misunderstandings "derive the erroneous interpretations of the texts". So even if you don't send anything too serious, don't let your words get lost in the translation. Speaking of therapists and other experts in relation, we have had a glimpse of some of the things you shouldnever Say on the text. Read the rest to discover what is not best, at least with regard to SMS.

Read this then:Never end a text message like this, experts warn.

1
"What do you mean?"

Worried and disappointed looking young woman lying on her bed in illuminated bedroom at night reading bad news in her e-mails, chat messages or social media posts on her Mobile Phone. Ambient Bedroom Night Lighting. Millenial Generation Modern Technology Lifestyle.
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If you want to plan a meeting place with your friend or send him a funny meme on text, go for it. But light conversations like these are probably where you should limit things.

"SMS are not a place to have a long conversation with another person. Too much can be lost in the translation," warnsKali Wolken, LMHC, an approved career advisor and mental health working withThe point of view In Grand Rapids, Michigan.

If you find yourself typing "What do you mean by that?" You must reassess and move the conversation to communication in person whenever possible.

"When we talk with a face to face, we can pick up all the communication pieces - verbal and non -verbal. This reduces the chances of misinterpreting something, and we can also quickly ask for clarification if we feel confused "Explains Wolken. "While we can say" what do you mean by that? "In a textual response, delays and (still) the lack of non-verbal that goes through a text can cause more problems to understand text."

2
"I'm breaking up with you."

Young man sitting at home, feeling depressed and trying to contemplate bad news he is reading online using a smart phone
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We have all probably been at one end of a breaking text at a given time. But if you were the person who sent such a message, you should avoid starting again in the future.

Haley Riddle, LPCA, an approved therapist working withMynd Psychiatry, says that the break with someone on the text should never be considered an option. "Deciding to send an SMS to your partner to end the relationship can be hurtful and disrespectful," she explains.

According to Riddle, many people come back to the choice of digital communication for ruptures to try to avoid conflicts or show their own emotions. But she says that SMS something like "I break with you" is often considered by the recipient "as informal and impersonal" and can also have a negative impact for the sender.

"SMS are not the equivalent [to have a conversation in person," said Riddle. "When we decide to put an end to the relationship in relation to the text, they are not entirely fenced due to leaving a lot of interpretation."

3
"I love you." (for the first time)

Man using smartphone at home
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Regarding SMS, you should not send another significant, you should not necessarily be negative.

AccordingChris Rabanera, LMFT, an approved therapist working in online therapy andfounder of Thebaseeq, you should never tell your partner "I love you" for the first time thanks to an SMS. "It's the wrong way to use SMS," he said.

Instead, Rabanera says that "big moment conversations" like this should only be made. "When you say something like that to a person, you want to be present," he explains. "You want to see their reaction. You want to be there in person with them. You want the full experience."AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB

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4
"No matter."

Senior woman using smartphone sitting on the couch at home
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Most of us have probably removed a quick text "whatever the text by frustration more than we do not even remember. But butAditya Kashyap Mishra, aexpert expert Work with Moodfresher, says it is the only word that she advises to the people ofnever send a text message. "It is an infallible way of putting an end to a conversation. It is a way of saying that you do not care about the other person or the conversation."

We usually send a "anything" text in a few moments of anger, butHeidi McBain, LMFT, aonline therapist And mom coach, says anger is a secondary emotion that should not be shared with others via the text because it does not really solve what problem upsets you. "When the emotional responsiveness is high, we can send SMS to things that we do not mean without time and space to filter them and treat them first," explains McBain.

5
Everything related to negative emotions.

Upset girl with a phone
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In the end, you must avoid sending a text which "has a negative emotion attached to it", according toMichael Morris, a former therapist working in family advice and the current editorial director forRough and tumbled gentlemen. "Any expression of disappointment, anger, resentment or fear is almost always better discussed via direct communication," he said, as face to face or on the phone.

"There is a feeling of emergency linked to negative emotions [and], the need to express these feelings can be intense," recognizes Morris. "Often, we forget that there is someone on the other side [of the text], who is injured, surprised or angry by our words, and seeing people make us more polite. People are generally much more Respectful and deliberate during a person in a conversation person, and it is the "railings" that prevent us from saying unnecessarily hurtful or shredded things ".

Heather Wilson, LCSW, the executive director ofWell-being of the epiphany, even goes so far as to advise to share strong feelings or opinions on the text to avoid more bad communication. "If you plan to share something that could be interpreted as negative or offensive, it is better to do so in person. In this way, you can assess the reaction of the other person and explain your feelings more clearly."


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