5 signs your relationship does not work, according to the therapists

These are the warning signs that your partner may not be the one for you.


Ruptures are often described as the result of an overwhelming event - a person enters theirPartner cheating or someone associates itself after their significant otheradmits to having lied About something big. Sometimes that drops in this way, but many relationships are simply moving slowly because two people have made it possible that they are not correct for each other. Although it can be difficult to leave something without a major incident incident, experts advise you not to keep something just for good. In this spirit, we have consulted therapists to discover five signs that your relationship simply does not work. Read the rest to find out what you should be on the lookout.

Read this then:5 flag -like red relations that everyone is missing, experts warn.

1
You always fight and it becomes more intense.

Young Couple Arguing and Fighting
Istock / Gorodenkoff

Each couple fights and conflicts are not always a bad thing, according toMarley Howard, a licensefamily and marriage therapist With more than 12 years of experience. But she says it's a red flag if "you arestill Fight "with your partner.

"There is generally an underlying fear, avoidance and inauthenticity behind a lack of conflict in a relationship," explains Howard. "However, arguments with your spouse are a warning sign if they are constantly performing."

Omar Ruiz, LMFT, aapproved therapist And the founder of Online Private Practice, LLC, warns people to pay attention to increased intensity surrounding the arguments with their partner. According to Ruiz, it is often a major indicator that your relationship becomes toxic. "The more frequent and intense the arguments, the less the couple is able to regain control of their relationship," he explains.

2
But you no longer solve conflicts.

Shot of a young woman looking upset after a fight with her partner at home
istock

When it comes to constant fights,Laura Silverstein, LCSW, aCertified couples therapist and handgrown Line Counseling Partners, saysBetter life That the real problem comes down to conflicts that are never resolved. "All the couples are fighting, but if none of the parties work to try to defuse tension or makeup after a fight, the relationship is not in good shape," she said.

If you arrive at a point where you notice visceral signs like your root or difficulty battery, you should move away from the argument, according to Silverstein. "When you are in a state like this, you and your partner can do and say things you regret," she explains. "If you do not reprimand yourself to apologize later, it will probably lead to resentment."

At the same time, when the conflict is not properly resolved, it moves the snowballs in you and your partner who beat you on the same things again and again, addsGinamarie Guarino, LMHC, a licensemental health advisor Work with Psych Point.

"If you are in a cycle to chat with your partner or you feel as you do not do, you are not heard, understood or validated, your relationship may not work," says Guarino. "These warning panels indicate a deep problem in communication, as well as a feeling of professional exhaustion of the two partners and a lack of camaraderie between partners who affect their ability to solve relationship problems."

Read this then:The 6 words that you should "never" tell your partner, according to a therapist.

3
You have started to hide your partner's things.

male couple talking
Zinkevych / Istock

On the other hand, a lack of conflict in your relationship could be because you withdraw from your partner out of fear, according toNancy Landrum, aRelationship coach and creator of the Millionaire Marriage Club. And this can be an indicator in itself that your relationship does not work. "This is a problem if you are afraid of raising a subject which, in your opinion, needs attention," explains Landrum. "In a healthy relationship, everything can be discussed with the expectation of a respectful and frank response."AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB

This lack of openness and honesty in your relationship could also make you adopt an additional negative behavior with your partner. According to Howard, you should worry if you feel like you have started to keep some things from your partner. "The right to privacy is different, but hiding the information from your spouse they should know is a red flag. This indicates that you do not trust your partner," she explains.

4
And you get more confident to other people.

A young woman is talking with a female friend about her problem in a cafe. The friend is supportive and understanding.
istock

Kevin Darné, aexpert expert and author ofMy cat will not go away! (A relationship with a relationship), warns people to pay attention to their communication with others in relation to their partner. "When you condemn yourself to friends, colleagues or foreigners of your dissatisfaction in your relationship instead of talking to your partner, it is a bad sign," he said. "In your efforts to gain a sympathetic ear, he also creates the possibility of establishing aemotional affair. ""

Many people are starting to confide more to other people after having communicated their problems to their partner but did not feel heard. It is also a bad sign.Boone Christianson, LMFT, a licensewedding and family therapist in Provo, Utah, and author of101 therapy talks, says that the relationships that do not work generally include a dynamic where a person is dissatisfied while the other does not see a problem.

"As a couple therapists, we always say:" If one of you has a problem, the relationship has a problem. "If a person says the couple needs therapy, he needs therapy," said Christianson. "Sometimes the partner in the denial will come once the problem will affect them enough, but this point is generally a threat of separation."

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5
You are no longer looking forward to spending time with them.

older couple riding bikes
Whisper

Relations take work, and it is not always easy. But at the end of the day, you should stillenjoy be with your other significant other. "Life is a personal trip. A relationship should complete its life and not be its essence," shares Darné.

One of the clearest signs that you are no longer satisfied with the relationship in which you find yourself is that "you no longer expect the time you spend with them"Beth Ribarsky, PHD, aexpert expert and interpersonal communication professor at the University of Illinois Springfield. This can train you "stressed when you see them calling or sending SMS," she explains. "Or you could find excuses to avoid your partner."

At the same time, you are also responsible for helping to bring the pleasure of your relationship. It is therefore possible to reverse this problem if you do not want to end things with your partner. "It is easy for couples to fall into the simple management of relationships with the relationship together (invoices, children, household responsibilities, etc.)", explainsErica Taylor, LCSW-S, an approved clinical social worker who has private practice in Texas whichProvides couples as a couple. "But if you are not intentional to cultivate pleasure, your relationship will not work."


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