The 6 largest errors over 50 are, according to experts
They can be the best years of your relationship, avoid these common traps.
Many things change after the age of 50: our body, our friendships,And our finances, to name just a few. Another area to watch is your relationship. Whether you are married or in a long -term partnership, you can seeChange in your union in your sixth decade. Developments in your libido, your personality, your childcare situation and your accommodation come into play - and, if you are not careful, they could cause countless bad communications and other problems between you and your partner . Fortunately, you can avoid these cracks. In front, the therapists tell us the biggest errors of relationships of couples over 50 years old - and how to make sure you see them coming.
Read this then:5 red flags that spell the divorce, say the therapists.
1 They become too absorbed by their children.
Children are important, but your partner too. "I have seen many people absorb in the lives of their children and grandchildren, which led them to minimize the importance of their own relationship," explainsCynthia MCKAY, Jd, ma, lake,Clinical psychotherapist and relational therapist. "This practice can cancel the possibility of an enriching lifestyle or retirement." Instead, prioritize your link. McKay encourages travel, learning together and the rest curious about everyone's life.
2 They assume that their sex life will decrease.
It's not all down here. Quite the opposite, in fact. "Couples over 50 could believe that they are too old to enjoy sex or too old for orgasm, which is not true," saysKatie Ziskind, LMFT, owner ofWisdom in counseling. "If you are over 50 and find it difficult to reach an orgasm, the privacy and marriage therapy can help you understand what is going on and support an authorized sexual experience." In this way, you can rediscover everyone's tastes and aversions and create new and improved experiences in the room.
Read this then:5 flag -like red relations that everyone is missing, experts warn.
3 They hide medical problems.
Honesty is the key in any relationship. ButSam Nabil, CEO andmain therapist In Naya's clinics, notes that some couples become less direct as they age, even around major problems such as health problems. "They want to avoid being a burden for their partners and / or spouses, especially when their other half goes through their own challenges of quarantine," explains Nabil. "However, this often makes them distant and absent in the relationship, leaving their partners alone and undesirable."
Facing team health problems is a necessity. Your partner deserves your full honesty and you deserve a person to count during difficult times.
4 They do not plan in advance for retirement.
Retirement causes a major change in your lifestyle and couples must prepare it properly. "Although the couple can be financially" adjusted ", they are often not aware - or prepared for - the challenges that occur when work is no longer a major objective of their lives," explainsclinical psychologist Carla Marie Manly. "Couples often end up bickering with each other as a result of spending too much time together, having insufficient personal interests or having too many shared interests."AE0FCC31AE342FD3A1346EBB1F342FCB
Ideally, you can plan in advance to discover new shared and independent companies. Manly suggests things such as volunteering, exercise programs, friendships and travel.
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5 They embrace complacency.
Do you know the cliché of the old couple who is still bickering or does not speak? Avoid it at all costs. "The most common error that we see that long -term couples of more than 50 years are committed in their relationship is to become happy ... To the point where they do not care to improve or solve problems", ExplainCierra Fisher, LPCA, Ed.S., Aapproved therapist In Healthy Habits Therapy in Charleston, South Carolina. "It is an error because it decreases the accomplishment in the relationship and the general well-being."
Turn things over by solving any problem or dissatisfaction you have in the relationship. Then work together to establish an action plan that targets and ends up eliminating these problems, explains Fisher. "This will result in a more fulfilling, happier and healthier relationship at any age," she adds.
6 They remain in a relationship that no longer works.
Sometimes you just have to call things to leave things. "I would say that a common relationship error that long -term couples make over 50 years remain in a relationship that no longer works due to the fear of being alone or being single," saidLauren Napolitano, Psy.D, aclinical psychologist . "I work with women in therapy, and some women feel that they have not been single since the beginning of their twenties and that it would be too frightening to start again. They fear being unattractive for new contenders, they fear managing their own finances, and they fear that their children are angry with them if they divorce their partner. ""
If you are unhappy in your relationship , Napolitano suggests trying advice as a couple. "It is worth speaking openly and directly with your partner on how the relationship may have changed over the years and what can be done to rebuild something that is pleasant for both of you," she said. From there, you can decide whether things are worth it to be saved or not.