The 15 worst reasons to delay a break
The most imperious case to be single could be right in front of you.
To say goodbye to someone you love is difficult. So so that the agony of simplymanufacturingThe decision to break is usually much more difficult than the actual break itself. After all, unless your SO did something more blatant, for example, chose to sleep with your best friend - it's too easy to delay the catch of the card according to nothing more than a whirlwind of feelings Iffy and emotional confusion.
To help provide clarity, we have compiled all the most common and common for people deciding to stick to a relationship when they would be better to go to the door. So, if one of these sounds is too familiar, you may want to rethink where things stand. And if you are frightened really scared to be alone, be sure to read our list of15 signs that you should definitely be single.
1. It's not the "good time" to break
NewsFlash: There is no "good time" for a break. If your birthday, Valentine's Day or birthday goes up and are worried about how a split could affect them or you want to participate in the celebration, it's actually a nice way to just get it. "People have put an end to a relationship because they do not want to miss something pleasure or" ruining "a big day for the other person", explainsSusan Golicic, Ph.D. and certified relations coach. Not only is it selfish to stay just because you want to do something pleasure or worry about causing a punch, but it's also dishonest. In addition, you can be smarter about breakingavoiding these things.
2. Your relationship "looks" good
"You and your partner can look like the perfect couple outside and a lot of your relationship can make sense, but you could be extremely unhappy, unsatisfied and not supported," saysShula Mélamé, a coach of relationships and well-being in New York. If it looks like you, it's better to take action to a break. "Keep appearances will take a toll on you emotionally and psychologically." Now, if you're not sure if you should break a relationship, here'sSome warning signs to search.
3. You love their family
It's not because you get along with someone's parents (and maybe like them even better than yours) is not a reason to stay with them and avoid a break. "You are in partnership with the person and so your daily life is with them - not their families," saysJenn Kennedy, an authorized marriage and a family therapist located in Santa Barbara, in ca. "Staying because you like the family possibly reproducing resentment and force the family to choose between you and your partner. You can not wait enough support or sympathy on your relationship with his own parents." Although if you like your partner but do not like their family, here's why you shouldKeep that to yourself.
4. You think they are a good person in the heart
Maybe you cross a rough patch with your S.o., but you wrote it because you know that in depth, they are basically good. "These feelings keep people in bad relationships all the time," saysMontigus Jackson, a licensed mental health advisor specialized in Counseling Couples. "It's hard for people to put their feelings aside for the improvement of their well-being." If it looks like you, examine your recent experience on your partner. But if you want your current relationship to eternally, hereThe secrets of the best relations.
5. Sex is amazing
"All good relationships start with good chemistry!" said Esme Oliver, dating expert and author ofSmoke drink F * # K. "Although chemistry and hot sex are certainly important, you can not stay in a dysfunctional relationship simply because what's going on in the bedroom is good." This is because you are probably missed on real intimacy and a real love.
"Go out!" She advises. "Get a vibrator and move on." Or, if you are a guy, tryThese tips for transforming your next partner into a sex goddess.
6. You stay together for your children
It is natural to fear that a break or divorce would affect your children, and it is certainly a problem that should be treated with care. But often, parents who want to separate can do a better job separately than together. "Children need an environment fed, loving and healthy," said Dr. Foojan Zeine, psychologist and author ofReset life. "A cold or hostile environment filled with resentment and agitation does not create a safe space for children to live or provide a role model to base their future relationships," she explains. "Happy parents who are divorced and take care of their children would be a healthier space for children to grow up." Moreover, thereare much more ways of being A great daddy.
7. You're afraid of being alone
Sometimes remaining in a less ideal relationship feels easier than facing once. But "stay with someone just because you want to be with someone is not a big reason," says Mélamé. "If you leave the fear dictating your choices, the results of these choices will not be free of anxiety or necessarily what will serve you better. Instead of embarking a fear relationship, examine why you have anxiety to be anxiety. alone." And in addition we haveLarge dating councils of a very sought after matchmaker after To help you come back in the game.
8. They treat you better than anyone
If you have had a bad relationship in the past and you have reason to stay in your present, it's not so bad, it's a big red flag. "Comparing your relationship with the worst you've ever had is a low bar to be defined," saysJim Seibold, a marriage and a family therapist in Arlington, TX. "It means that the current relationship should only be slightly better than another bad." Instead of accepting less, "Goal High", Seibold recommends. "If someone does not take you with dignity, respect and honesty, keep looking."
9. Your partner crosses something difficult
It is natural to want to be there for someone to worry when times are difficult. "People stay in a relationship when they do not want to add to the injury that the partner already knows", Note Golicic. "However, staying, you lie to the person, and they will be wound worse when it ends because they will know that you will stimulate pity's pity," she says. That, or they might feel the inauthenticity in Your support and be even more upset. "It is better to be honest with the person (sympathetic). Once they work through the pain, they will agree that it was the good thing to do. "
10. You are comfortable
Staying with someone because it's easy, even if you know they are not the right person for you is more common than you think. "When I work with couples in this scenario, it's disturbing," saysWendi L. Dumbroff, a certified professional advisor specializing in couples and sexual therapy. "All doubts that were present in advance will not be pale on only in the background. On the contrary, they are likely to enlarge and become more of a problem. In addition, the foundation of the relationship is Never really strong, so there is no basic force to draw when they arrived at therapy for help. "In other words, it is probably smarter from zero. And when you do, start at the right foot bysaying one of these things to the first date.
11. You are worried, you will not find anyone better
Maybe recovering dating applications rings like a total nightmare, or you just think that your current partner is the best you can do. This kind of thought is dangerous. "After having been with someone so long, we fear not only to be alone, but we also fear that we are not good enough for someone else," says Davis, Related Expert, Coach of life and CEO ofLuma luxury matchmaking. "It's so harmful because it's wrong. You are worthy of the love you give." In addition, there isMany dating applications that are not so bad.
12. You are afraid of what people will say
When breaks occur, people talk, and it's not always easy to treat. "He's strong about the subject of attention when the subject is ruptured," says Kennedy. But it's not something you should let you stop being really happy. "Often, fervor on what happened will be settled while the next drama is happening. Others take signals on your part, so if you can move to a positive and mature attitude, too."
13. You hope they will change
"Sorry to say, but he's unrealistic to expect people to change," says Davis. In fact, people can really change only when motivation comes from the inside, and even then it can be a fighting battle. "The habits and traits you hate so many are sewn in the way they are. If you stand with this person, you will continue to be dropped," she explains.
14. You have been together forever
"Longevity makes it harder to leave, but should not be a reason to stay," says Seibold. It's not because you have history does not mean that things are forced to work by finishing. "If you are unable to solve the problems, stay together, it's not a good solution," he adds.
15. You worry about doing it alone
There is the fear of being alone, then there will be the fear of whether or not you can survive on your own - and these are two very different problems. "One of the worst reasons why people stay in relationships are also because they do not feel sufficiently loans both mentally, financially and emotionally - at break and strengthen their lives on new terms", noteChelsea Leigh Trescott, a break coach. Maybe you are not sure how you will pay your rent or feel that you need your partner's emotional support to continue your daily tasks. Anyway, if it's the only thing that keeps you invested in the relationship, it's time to re-evaluate.
For more incredible advice for smarter life, more beautiful and feeling younger, follow usFacebook now!