13 secrets, you should always keep from your partner

Your other other does not need to know everything about you ... no?!


Conventional wisdom dictates that Muni is bad, a friend is worse, and in alover is verboten. The building blocks of a healthy relationship are integrity, the committee and especiallyhonesty. Break some of this base and the Shebang set collapses.

But let's face it: life is not always so simple, and we are not all scouts of boys. In fact, I would be willing to say that lying can be not only intelligent but also very healthy for a relationship. Does she really need to know you destroy her friends? Would it really help things if he learned your feelings about hisbeef Stroganoff? On both owners, the answer isnoAnd it's just that we are honest. Read on to learn instances where you need to hold your language. And when you're done with that, make sure to learnThe 30 things you should tell your partner on the regular.

1
Your sexual story

Secrets, relationships, couple

Although it can sometimes happen in a conversation, relationship experts say that, with the exception of the medical concerns you may have (as if you are both up-to-date on STD tests, for example), discuss your history Sexual with your SO has advantages about zero. "The number of sexual partners is the one on the couple therapy," saidDavid Ezell, the clinical director ofDarien Wellness. "Do not ask and do not say it", "he advises. "Some people like the juvenile idea of ​​a virgin or groom bride, some really want a seasoned partner and most lands somewhere between the two. But most often, it's a subject that should stay out of boundary even If you think you can predict the results. "For more good relationships, here isSecret tips for building the best relationships.

2
Your Single Secret Behaviors

Secrets, relationships, woman
Refuge

Look: Everyone does strange things when they are alone; It's totally normal. "If you are delivered in a strange behavior while you were alone, like eating an entire cake while watching a bad TV TV in your underwear, keep it to yourself," suggestsErica Gordon, an expert in relation and the author of the dating bookAre not you happy to read this? This information will only be useful for your partner in any way, so they do not need to know about it. Speaking of being single, did you knowWhat sometimes it can be a good thing?

3
Your minor relationship of doubts

Secrets, Relationships, man
Shutter

"There are moments in new and long-standing relationships when you want to ask if you want the relationship to continue," saysKarol, LCSW, a licensed psychotherapist and a trust coach. If this is the first time you have these feelings, do not feel as if you have to share them with your partner. "These initial thoughts are not useful to share because they will create insecurity and wounded feelings," she explains. And very often, they will solve by themselves. "Sit with your feelings and treat them alone. Only if the feelings persist and become stronger over time, should you share them with your partner." If you have doubts, however, be sure to checkThe 20 signs that your relationship may have problems.

4
That you want them to have more success

Secrets, relationships, business meeting

Let's say your partner has a work that is passionate, but that did not necessarily leave them rolling in the dough. Or maybe you can not understand why they do not just try a little more difficult to go up their ranks to their current concert. "If you share this frustration, your comments will be experienced as non-supported and hurtful for your partner," saysRhonda milrad, LCSW, founder of theRational Online community. In the end, it is probably best to keep these thoughts yourself. This is especially true if your S.o has already had trouble confidence problems in the past. But if you are the one that allows you to advance the scale of the company, here are the proven waysIntelligent employees advance to work.

5
You do not like one of their family members

Secrets, relationships, in-laws
Refuge

"This is one of the most difficult secrets to keep, but one of the most important," saysPaul Depompo, Psyd, Clinical Psychologist. "You certainly do not have to say that you like them, but spit hate will only close fire." And if their mother, his sister, his brother, his uncle or whoever is really terrible ", finally, this question will come to light and that you play a support role," says Depompo.

6
That you do not like something they can not change

Secrets, relationships, couple

Another time you do not need to be brutally honest? When your partner can do nothing of your complaint. "It's a lot more nice to wear small white lies that have to do with your partner's haircut, hair color, meat meat recipe and dance moves," saysMasini of April, a relationship and an expert label. "If you like someone, sacrifice the truth in these situations. Tell them you want seconds on meat meat, ask them to dance and compliment their haircut. Their smile in return will let you know that you have does the right thing. "

7
You think one of their friends is hot

Secrets, relationships, couple
Refuge

"If you are attracted to one of their close friends, it is normal to keep that a secret," says Gordon. Of course, this is true only if you never plan to act on your appeal. If you do, it's a totally different situation and a conversation should have had it. But if it's just that you are a bit attracted by one of their friends, it does not matter. "In addition, you would do everything that is immediately embarrassing if you told your partner that you think their friend is hot," she adds. On the other hand, it's fun ofto be attracted to, so learnThe best way to strengthen your sex uses the stratosphere.

8
What you spend your personal money on

Secrets, relationships, couple

You have probably heard about tips before even if you have joint finances in a relationship, each of you should also have your own personal bank account. There are several reasons for that, but one of them is that it is really good to spend money on small things that your partner does not know. "There are times when you expenses money just for you," said Ward. Obsessed with a pair of expensive sneakers that you know your S.O. would not address 300 dollars on? No big problem. But Ward anticipates that "if these expenses are starting to affect your joint finances, you will have to talk about it." That said, hope you do not spend money on any of theThe 40 things that no man over 40 should not possess,already.

9
Something negative your friends or family say of them

Secrets, relationships, friends
Refuge

"It is better that you do not share the first negative reactions that your loved ones had about your partner," says Milrad. "These comments can be very hurtful and hard to recover. If you reveal them, your partner will always remember what has been said and later can use it as evidence that your family or friend never loved them from the beginning." Moreover, what do they acquire to know? That's right - nothing.

10
You had a better sex

Secrets, relationships, sex
Refuge

So maybe you had a better time between sheets with one of your past interests. This is not something you should share with your current lover. "Your partner wants to know that they are the best lover ever," says Masini. "They want you to forget all the others in front of them, so let them think that you have. There is no good that can come to let your partner know how big sex was with someone from Other in your past. In fact, it opens a box pandora, so keep it closed. Tell them they are the best you have ever had and look at their self-esteem (an unexpected aphrodisiac flower). " more, the good news is that we just knowHow to turn your partner into a sex goddess.

11
That you were not initially attracted by them

Secrets, relationships, couple

"The attraction often grows after learning how to know someone," saysKIMBERLY HERSHENSON, LMSW. By formally mentioning that it took time for you to be attracted to your current partner does not bring you useful. "This information is hurtful and now irrelevant. You are with them now for a reason, so you do not need to share that the attraction ended up growing," she adds.

12
You like "x" better on your ex

Secrets, relationships, holding hands

"There is no point in reminding me with your partner of what you are missing from your ex or what was better in this relationship," said Depompo. After all, what will happen? Maybe your ex was a better cook, planned better dates or shared your interest in a certain hobby, but your past relationship ended for a reason, so let it go. "Time is better spending what you have learned and enjoy and build yourself where you can in this relationship," Depompo's notes.

13
That you think they should lose weight

Secrets, relationships, scale
Refuge

But you already knew it.

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